Many people say that universities should only offer places to young students with the highest marks, while others say they should accept people of all ages, even if they did not do well at school. Discuss both views, and give your own opinion. Tertiary education is essential for achieving success in life.
Nowadays, there is a widely held belief that learners with the highest grades should be the only group to study at higher-educational institutions such as universities and colleges. However, others argue that, no matter how old they are, all people should be provided with tertiary education even if they did not excel at school. This essay will look into both viewpoints and give my personal opinion on the topic.
On the one hand, Students who did well at school are often thought to be smart and hard-working. Therefore, they deserve to be in a favorable environment that caters to their needs and interests. Conversely, if they were to study in a low-quality institution, they would not be able to expand their capacity and potential. In addition, governments can ensure that future knowledge workers will have the necessary skills and expertise to help the economy thrive by only accepting people with the highest marks. This is because those who had poor grades are pushed into blue-collar jobs, leaving knowledge-based professions for students of the highest caliber.
On the other hand, age does not reflect an individual’s intellectual prowess. More precisely, as people grow older, they might not be as sharp-witted as they used to be. However, they instead accumulate knowledge and experience over time, even more so than their younger counterparts. This can enable them to compete with or even surpass the younger generations. Moreover, intelligence is not the only factor contributing to future success. Although it is true that ingenuity and shrewdness are both advantageous in this day and age, there are also other elements at play that are as crucial. For instance, when looking for a potential employee, recruiters often put great emphasis on various personal qualities and skills such as perseverance, interpersonal skills, leadership, and so on. Thus, it is clear that employers now demand more from job-seekers than just pure intellect.
In conclusion, although only providing university education for students with high marks is beneficial in some ways, I still firmly believe that higher education should be open up for all people regardless of their age and school performance.
Vo DatMany people say that universities should only offer places to young students with the highest marks, while others say they should accept people of all ages, even if they did not do well at school. Discuss both views, and give your own opinion.Tertiary education is essential for achieving success in life.
Where did you find this practice essay? The last sentence is anomalous, out of place.
You wrote nearly 350 words. The minimum is 250. You will not lose points for writing more; however, longer essays generally do not get high band scores. And there are many reasons for this.
First, the longer the essay, the more chances you have to make errors, and you will lose points for each of those errors.
Second, your writing may be repetitious and wordy. This will cost you points in task response or coherence and cohesion.
Third, you will likely stray off-topic, and examiners will deduct points if you are not focused on the topic. Do not write about things that are not specifically given in the task. You will also be tempted to use weak or unsound arguments or even lose your direction and contradict yourself. Develop just two or three argument points with examples and personal experiences. It is much better to have two well-developed and fleshed-out argument points than to have four which are just individual separate statements.
Fourth, you will spend a lot of time writing, and not have sufficient time left over to proofread your essay. You will miss the silly mistakes, which everyone makes, and that lowers your score.
Fifth, pity the examiners who have to read all the IELTS essays individually. There are hundreds of them. If they read your long essay when they are tired at the end of the day, they will score extra hard and not be very generous when scoring.
Sixth, you will not have enough time for Task 1, and get a lower score there. You should allow 40 minutes for task and 20 minutes for Task 1. The word counts are designed so that you have ample time for brainstorming and then writing the two parts.
Aim to write around 270 words for Task 2. Practice writing a lot of essays so you get a feeling for the length.
You can use this word counter: https://www.ieltsscore.com/word-counter/
Nowadays, there is a widely held belief that learners (unnatural, awkward) young applicants / recent high school graduates with the highest grades should be the only group to study (That is not a good paraphrase.) only ones admitted by higher-educational institutions such as universities and colleges. However, others argue that, no matter how old they are, all people should be provided with (That is not a good paraphrase.) given the opportunity to get a tertiary education even if they did not excel at school. This essay will look into both viewpoints and give my personal opinion on the topic.
Only paraphrase the topic. Do not paraphrase the prompt. You have to answer the prompt. Do not mention your essay. Don't write " I am going to give my opinion." Just give your opinion directly.
On the one hand, Students (Not a proper noun. No capital letter) people who did well at high school are often thought to be smart and hard-working. Therefore, they deserve to be in a favorable environment (That does not make sense. It is not related to the topic.) that caters to their needs and interests. Conversely, if they were to study in a low-quality institution, (Off topic. It is not about the quality of the school.) they would not be able to expand their capacity and potential. In addition, governments can ensure that future knowledge workers will have the necessary skills and expertise to help the economy thrive by only accepting people (Off topic. It is not about governments. It is about universities.) ( with the highest marks. This is because those who had poor grades are pushed into blue-collar jobs, leaving knowledge-based professions for students (After someone graduates from high school, before they are accepted in a university, they are no students. Only people in a school are students.) of the highest caliber.
On the other hand, age does not reflect an individual’s intellectual prowess. (Why did you just contradict yourself?) More precisely, as people grow older, they might not be as sharp-witted as they used to be.(You are off-topic.) However, they instead accumulate knowledge and experience over time, even more so than their younger counterparts. (That is a truism. Of course older people have more experience - they are older. They have lived more years. It is not a very insightful sentence. ) This can enable them to compete with or even surpass the younger generations. Moreover, intelligence is not the only factor contributing to future success. (That is not on this topic.) Although it is true that (Do not use these dummy-it clauses. They are useless.) ingenuity and shrewdness are both advantageous in this day and age, there are also other elements at play that are as crucial. For instance, when looking for a potential employee, recruiters often put great emphasis on various personal qualities and skills such as perseverance, interpersonal skills, leadership, and so on. (That is completely off-topic.) Thus, it is clear that (Do not use these dummy-it clauses. They are useless.) employers now demand more from job-seekers than just pure intellect. (Completely off-topic. It is not about employment.)
In conclusion, although only providing university education for students with high marks is beneficial in some ways, I still firmly believe that higher education should be open (wrong form) up for all people regardless of their age and school performance.
Most of your essay was off-topic. It is about admissions to universities. You did not write much about admissions and selection of applicants to colleges and universities. It is not about the job market. Native speakers often get very low marks on the IELTS tests because they do not read the topic and focus their essay directly on the topic.
The same can be said about the level of formal education that someone has. Some very smart people around the world have little formal education for various reasons.
You need to use to instead of up.