The bar chart given compares the expenditure among the four nations named Italy, Germany,France,Britain on consumer goods. Units are measured in pound sterling.
Overall, the British spent the highest amount of money on all types of goods, while Germany had the least expenditure for those products.
The British spent the highest amount of money on photographic film , whereas Germany spent the least money which was only a little bit above 140000. In terms of tennis racquets,France had the least spending with also a few more than 140000, in contrast, Britain still took the first position as they spent almost 160 000 on this product. Furthermore, Italy had the most expenditure on buying toys,which was the same with France. On the other hand, their least spending was personal stereos,which was a little bit lower than the highest figure that belonged to Britain. Meanwhile, CDs and toys are the third and fourth most purchased by the 4 nations.
You did not attach the correct figure to the essay. You got them confused.
I copied the essay from your other post. You did not attach the correct file. You mixed them up.
Please read my advice for Task 1 essays:
IELTS TASK 1: Hints, Tips And Advice
Vocabulary Words For Task 1: Reference Post
The bar graph above (not a good choice. Do not use "given", "provided" "above" "below" or other similar words. Just describe the figure, no where it is. ) illustrates (wrong word. Read my advice.) the expenditure of spenders (That is a very unnatural and awkward phrase. No native speaker would write this.) in two (Look at the figure. Look very very carefully. Count the number of countries.) distinct (wrong word. All nations, by definition, are distinct. ) nations on consumer goods (Inadequate. There are different categories of these items. You have to tell the reader, or your essay will not have good coherence and cohesion.) in 2010. The monetary values are given is in pound (wrong form.) sterlings. (wrong form.)
Overall, the UK spent more money on consumer goods than France in the period given. (Redundant. You already gave the time reference.) The French spent the least money on cameras, (You did not mention any categories in the first paragraph. Poor coherence.) while it was perfume in the UK. What is more, the most money of the French and the UK people (awkward.) was spent on cars, (awkward) whereas the biggest expenditure gap (wrong phrase, unnatural) between the two countries was cameras. In terms of cars, )people in the UK spent about 450000 , (Do not write specific amounts in the "overall" paragraph. Put it in the "detail" paragraph.) which was 50000 more than the French. Similarly, the British spent approximately 100000 pounds more than people in France. (Which category, or overall?) Furthermore, the expenditure on cameras of the UK people (wrong phrase, unnatural. This is a detail, not a main feature. It is also repetitive. You already mentioned cameras.) was respectively 350000, which was twofold that of France, who only spent around 150000.
On the other hand, the French’s expenditure on the remaining goods (You did not list all the categories, so this is confusing.) was depicted to be higher.The figure (wrong word. read my advice.) for computers spending (That is not a category on this figure.) was slightly higher than that of the UK, with the amount of money spent above 350000 . Perfumes was the lowest figure (wrong word) of the UK, (unnatural, awkward.) as the money spent was just a little bit less than 150000, while the French also only spent about 200000 on it.
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Sample essay:
Paragraph #1: Describe the bar chart. Give the subject, the categories and units of measurement.
Paragraph #2: Report two or three main features. Do not report details.
Paragraph #3: Focus on comparisons. Compare the ranking of the categories and the difference between the two countries.
The bar graph compares spending, in pounds sterling, by people in the UK versus France in 2010 on five categories of consumer goods: Books, Cameras, Cars, Computers, and Perfume.
Overall, the British spent more than the French in total, even though the French had higher amounts in Computers and Perfume. Cars were the highest expense category and Perfume the lowest.
In detail, consumers in the UK and France had total expenditures of £1.69 million and £1.425 million respectively, with Cars having the largest amounts, £450,000 and £400,000. The next highest was different for the two, the UK with £400,000 on Books and France £375,000 on Computers. The amount for Books in France was £100,000 less than the British, and the amount for Computers was £50,000 less for the French. The category with the largest difference was Cameras. It was the third largest category for the UK, at £350,000, and the fifth (least) category for the French, who spent only half of that amount. Perfume was the fifth category for the UK ( £140,000) , and fourth for the French ( £200,000).