IELTS Writing Task 1 - Ashdown Museum

The table shows the overall number of tourists (Tourists is not an exact synonym for visitors.) of people who visited the Ashdown Museum one year before and after its refurbishment. The two pie charts report the results of a questionnaire regarding the satisfaction of visitors in the same two different periods.

Overall, the number of tourists dramatically increased after the museum was updated and so did the proportion of people who were satisfied or very satisfied by the visit of the museum. (This is repetitive.)

According to the charts, The share of dissatisfied visitors shrank from 40% to 10% and the same happened (Did it also shrink from 40% to 10%?) to very dissatisfied people. In this case, the number halved, amounting to 10%. (This is not clear. The very dissatisfied category went from 10 to 5%) The proportion of tourists who decided not to answer fill the survey, instead, has remained the same.

Besides, the refurbishment of the museum seems not only to have had a positive effect on the overall number of visitors (You are drawing a conclusion. Do not do this in task 1. Just describe the data.) which increased by 18,000 units, (People are not units.) but also on the number of positive reviews. In fact, the proportion of satisfied tourists which amounted to 30% before the redevelopment, it is now around 40%. The share of very satisfied people, instead, has been characterised by an increased by twenty percentage points, amounting to 35%.

The table and two pie charts together show what happened before and after a refurbishment project at the Ashdown Museum in terms of the numbers of visitors and their satisfaction levels. In particular, the table lists the numbers of attendees in the year before and the year after the project. The two pie charts report the results of satisfaction surveys in those same time periods. The satisfaction levels shown on the charts are: very satisfied, satisfied, dissatisfied and very dissatisfied. The charts show the percentages of each as taken from the surveys.

Overall, the visitor numbers increased substantially after the project. In addition, the visitors who came after the renovation were much more satisfied with their museum experience. Most of the people who were asked responded to the survey in each year.

In detail, visitor numbers increased 25% from 74000 to 92000 and three-quarters of the visitors were either satisfied or very satisfied with the renovated museum compared to less than half (45%) before. In particular, those who said they were dissatisfied went down from 40% to 15%, and very dissatisfied category dropped by half, from 10% to 5%. The questionnaire had a 95% response rate in both periods.

Thank you

I knew that visitors and tourists don't have the same meaning, but I was looking for a synonym of visitors and tourists was the only word I thought of. I guess there is no a "real" synonym for visitors.

I also knew that the first part of the fourth paragraph was a bit "borderline".

Anyway, I just wanted to ask two things:

1) What would you write in place of " the same happened"?

The share of dissatisfied visitors shrank from 40% to 10% and the same happened ...

I didn't like "the same happened" either, but I didn't know what else I could have written.

2) Would you consider "fill the survey" a mistake or answer is just a more appropriate way to say the same thing? (I know that the word "answer" was given by the text, but I was looking for another way to say the same)

The proportion of tourists who decided not to answer fill the survey, instead, has remained the same.

Thank you for your help

vallo971) What would you write in place of " the same happened"?

It was not the same, so it "the same" does not work.

e.g.

Sue: I got 100% on the maths test!!
Rick: The same thing happened to me. I got 100% too. It was an easy exam, wasn't it?

The share of dissatisfied visitors shrank from 40% to 10%. A decline also can be observed in the "very dissatisfied" category. In this case, the proportion halved, from 10 to 5%.

The shares of both the dissatisfied and very dissatisfied visitors became much smaller, shrinking from 40% to 10% in the former group and from 10% to 5% in the latter.

The charts beneath display the amount of guest to Ashdown Museum throughout the year long previous and the year later it was renovate.The diagram demonstrate outcome of survey asking visitant how pleased they were with their visit through the identical two interval.

It is obviously that the quantity of guest significantly increased after the reconditioned from 74000 before the reconstruction to 92,000 later it has been done .Now let's consider the charts above .The earlier on refurbishment show a negative pattern. The results of survey illustrate that only 15% of visitors were very satisfied and the number of disatisfied visitors was 40%.The year after refurbishment illustrates that the amount of people who were disatisfied declined and became 15% on a contrary, people who were very satisfied increased to 35%.Compairing the amount,of satisfied visitors we can also see an upward trend.It increased from 30% to 40% later the refurbishment.

To sum up,we can say that all work that has been done to attract new visitors to Ashdown Museum has reached it's aim.

Hi Nasam,

Do you still need help with that text?