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It is well acknowledged that there are people who can earn much higher in comparison with the average income in society across the world. There are some arguments against this phenomenon, which go alongside the proposal for governments to set a maximum amount of money that an individual can be paid. However, this is not the case for me and below are some reasons to support my view.


On the one hand, many people approve to introduce a limit on earnings because they believe that a huge pay gap in a community is likely to cause a sense of disparity. These days, employees in some particular fields are offered the highest rates of payment on the labor market due to the huge demand for these workforces. As the result, this would demotivate workers in other occupations who feel that the situation is unfair, leading to the job – dissatisfaction n and therefore bad performances at work.


On the other hand, I am firmly convinced that an extremely high wage can benefit the region. Firstly, there is evidence that an attractive employee remuneration policy will make it easier for companies to employ the best experts in their fields to work for them. Technology companies such as Google, for example, are able to hire the most talented programmers because of the huge sums that they are willing to pay. Furthermore, excellent pay packages will encourage people to work harder and more productively, which strongly contributes to the success of any organization. All in all, these positive impacts described above would result in a thriving economy and increased tax revenues for the host country as well.

To conclude, while some people suggest that salaries should be capped under a certain level, I contend that this is unnecessary because the advantages of allowing employees to earn such a high salary can outweigh its drawbacks.


Thank you for your helpful comments!

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Hi Julia,

You have some good ideas in your essay, but here are some comments from me:

1- You need to simplify your phrasing and write in a direct and concise manner. You wrote 309 words, and in the real exam, you may well not have enough time for that. Cut out the waffle and complicated sentences and focus on the ideas and how to structure your response, instead. Take a look at my replies in the links below to see what I'm talking about.

https://www.englishforums.com/English/EssayAgreeDisagreeYoungEnjoyLife-Older/bjnlwx/post.htm

https://www.englishforums.com/English/CanAnyoneCheckEssay/bwpzmg/post.htm

2- The topic sentence of a body paragraph should cover the scope of the entire paragraph; it should not be about just one point! For your first body paragraph, you may write, e.g. "On the one hand, some are in favour of introducing limits on the earnings of the super-rich". After the topic sentence, you present a point, elaborate on it, and give an example. After that, you present another point/argument, and so on.

3- The first point in your body paragraph (with the example about Google) is not clear. You need to explain why that is good! The rest of that body paragraph has really good ideas, and I feel that you should focus on them, and use the point about Google as an example in the end.


4- A general conclusion is meaningless. The conclusion should be specific and should summarize the main points/findings from the body paragraphs.

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Revise your essay, bearing in mind my comments above, and repost it below.