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In the 21st century, when the technology is developing steadily that means the media have also grown to provide the demands of people in a more convenient and rapid manner. Therefore, it is inevitable that some young people today would prefer to use smartphones than reading news in the newspaper or television. In this essay, I will analyze clearly the advantages and disadvantages and some solutions to solve this problems.

The major causes of this problem are that most newspapers and news programmes are designed for an adult audience and are not presented in a format that teenagers find attractive. First of all, because the language is too difficult to understand and the style and content is usually quite serious, few young people do not want to read them. Moreover, a lack of interest in news is also due to the fact that young people are not fascinated. Newspaper and news on television only exploit the problems about politics, diplomacy, outstanding issues of the day, do not exploit the issues that young people like or particularly interested in such as fashion, beauty, health, etc. As a result of this, there is fewer young people are interested in traditional news formats.

On the other hand, there are some strategies that can be used to encourage young people to keep abreast of the news. The first way to solve this would be to show special programs about idols, talk show sharing beauty tips, health care, fashion, etc. To do that, programs need to choose the right broadcast time for the young as the evening at the weekend. Secondly, in order for students to have access to traditional information, the school should encourage students to read newspapers, opening traditional information literacy competitions to let the students learn more.

In conclusion, young people reading newspapers and watching the news on television can increase dramatically if broadcasters know how to deploy information and choose the right time.

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Subject: Please review my IELTS essay
Message Body:
Topic: In many countries, very few young people read newspapers or follow the news on TV. What do you think are the causes of this? What solutions can you suggest?


My essay
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In the 21st century, when the technology is developing steadily that means the media have also had to grow grown to provide meet the demands of people in a more convenient and rapid manner. Therefore, it is inevitable that some young people today would prefer to use smartphones than reading the news on in the newspaper or watching it on television. In this essay, I will analyze clearly the advantages and disadvantages and some solutions to solve this problems. (That is an improper thesis statement. Don't ever write things like "In the essay, I will.." or "This essay examines the advantages..." Instead, give a summary or statement of the main point of your essay. See below.)

The major causes of this problem (What is the problem?) are that most newspapers and news programmes are designed for an adult audience and are not presented in a format that teenagers find attractive. First of all, because the language is too difficult to understand and the style and content is usually quite serious, few young people do not want to read them. Moreover, a lack of interest in news is also due to the fact that young people are not fascinated. (Incomplete. Fascinated by what?) Newspaper and news on television only exploit (wrong word) the problems about politics, diplomacy, outstanding issues of the day, do not exploit the issues that young people like or (missing word) particularly interested in such as fashion, beauty, health, etc. (Never use ellipses, "etc." or "and so on" in a formal essay. Write complete ideas. ) As a result of this, there is fewer young people (missing word) are interested in traditional news formats.

On the other hand, there are some strategies that can be used to encourage young people to keep abreast of the news. The first way to solve this would be to show special programs about idols, talk show sharing beauty tips, health care, fashion, etc. To do that, programs (wrong word. Programs cannot think or choose anything.) need to choose the right broadcast time for the young as the evening at the weekend. Secondly, Second, in order for students to have access to traditional information, the school (Which one?) should encourage students to read newspapers, and have opening traditional information literacy competitions to let the students learn more.

In conclusion, (missing words) young people reading newspapers and watching the news on television can increase dramatically if broadcasters know how to deploy (missing words) information and choose the right time.


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Comments  

Could you please check the essay written below?

Nowadays, following news on television or reading newspaper is becoming increasingly uncommon amongst the youth in many countries. Monotonous content and time constraints are the main factors which make reading or watching news less appealing to the youngsters. This essay will discuss these reasons in depth and put forward several solutions to tackle this issue.

There are two main reasons why many young people do not prefer reading news from a newspaper or follow news channel on TV. Firstly, the type of content by these traditional methods of news majorly consists of politics and business. The young generation has interests in varied fields like health, beauty, self-awareness, but to name a few. For instance, an upcoming hair stylist would be more interested in knowing the trends of the beauty industry as compared to how political parties are arguing about trivial things on social media. Secondly, it would not be possible for youth to view the news programs aired on the television during afternoon as they would be at either school or office. Thus, the type of news and inconvenient show timings are significant factors contributing to the decrease in young population consuming the news through newspaper or TV.

There are two ways by which newspapers and TV can attract more youngsters. The range of topics for news can be expanded to include subjects which youth cares about. For example, young people would be fascinated to read about the progress of mental awareness initiative taken by UNESCO, an international organization, to fight depression among young adults. In addition, TV programs could be recorded and made available on websites for people to view them at their convenience. As an example, recorded news could be easily accessed by phone by someone waiting for a bus while commuting to either school or office.

To recapitulate, youth is less interested in activities like reading a newspaper or watching television to follow news due to the lack of appealing content and inflexibility of show timings. The number of young people reading newspapers and watching television can be dramatically increased by adding new forms of content, and making existing content available on the internet.

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Could you please evaluate? I have ielts exam in next 2 days


Nowadays, following news on television or reading newspaper is becoming increasingly uncommon amongst the youth in many countries. Monotonous content and time constraints are the main factors which make reading or watching news less appealing to the youngsters. This essay will discuss these reasons in depth and put forward several solutions to tackle this issue.

There are two main reasons why many young people do not prefer reading news from a newspaper or follow news channel on TV. Firstly, the type of content by these traditional methods of news majorly consists of politics and business. The young generation has interests in varied fields like health, beauty, self-awareness, but to name a few. For instance, an upcoming hair stylist would be more interested in knowing the trends of the beauty industry as compared to how political parties are arguing about trivial things on social media. Secondly, it would not be possible for youth to view the news programs aired on the television during afternoon as they would be at either school or office. Thus, the type of news and inconvenient show timings are significant factors contributing to the decrease in young population consuming the news through newspaper or TV.

There are two ways by which newspapers and TV can attract more youngsters. The range of topics for news can be expanded to include subjects which youth cares about. For example, young people would be fascinated to read about the progress of mental awareness initiative taken by UNESCO, an international organization, to fight depression among young adults. In addition, TV programs could be recorded and made available on websites for people to view them at their convenience. As an example, recorded news could be easily accessed by phone by someone waiting for a bus while commuting to either school or office.

To recapitulate, youth is less interested in activities like reading a newspaper or watching television to follow news due to the lack of appealing content and inflexibility of show timings. The number of young people reading newspapers and watching television can be dramatically increased by adding new forms of content, and making existing content available on the internet.