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Hi

Are these lines fully natural? Any suggestions please?

In the new house something sad happened. Daddy adopted a very strange behavior of yelling and calling names. He became increasingly indifferent and self-centered, talking about only his needs and desires. There were perennial fights between him and my mother.

Thanks,

Tom

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Mr. TomAre these lines fully natural?

They seem all right to me. Emotion: smile

Mr. TomAny suggestions please?

Only one. ... adopted the very strange behavior of ...

You're going to name that behavior after 'of', so we all know which behavior it is. When everybody knows which, the secret is out, so to speak, so you use 'the'. Emotion: smile

CJ

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Are these lines fully natural? Any suggestions please?


I suggest >>>>.


In the new house something sad happened. Daddy started to behave very strangely,, yelling and calling other people names.. He became increasingly self-centred and indifferent to others,,' and . talked only about only his needs and desires. There were perennial fights between him and my mother.