Dear Friends,

My cousin has a very sad story. He was a very brilliant student. He has one bad habit he is a perfectionist. Story starts after he passed his 10th grade. He skipped appear his final exams of 11th grade. Then he slipped and didn't stop. Sometimes this happens, I hope you can understand. There is no doubt he is a brilliant learner and want to learn everything. I believe in-depth study always leads to failure. Students who just memorise books always get good marks. He always wanted to study and he still wants. He has already wasted his four years. Even if he starts studying now then he has to study for another two years to clear his high school. His general knowledge is excellent. In these four years he didn't stop studying but you know sadness and regret don't let to do anything. If he doesn't start study now then he will regret thruout his life and will be all time failure. I don't how to encourage him. Do you have any insipiration or any example? He has three bad habits, one is he always tries to learn thing beyond his syllabus, second is he can't memorise things I mean to say he likes to understand things, and third is he is perfectionist I mean to say he always likes to be at top of everything. I have to help him but don't know how to inspire him. In these four years he didn't do anything bad thing. Please help him.
Hello Jackson6612,

Being perfectionist isn't a bad thing, I am perfectionist aswell and it's everything going well with me..the only thing he has to learn is how to use it!;)
I'd tell your cousin that before starting memorising every word of a book...he should understand what he is memorising (maybe by making a summary..), what I do is to summarize everything with my own words, of course after understanding everything, and then "memorise" it. Honestly, there is no need to memorise it after the summarize as it's nearly everything in your brain!

Good luck;)


Dear Pucca,

Thank you for your advice. But reason is that he has lost his confidence. I don't know how to encourage him. He think he is a loser. Do you know anyone who after being a failure for almost 5-6 years became a success? Do you know of anyone who can inspire him? My cousin always wanted to become a big shot. I think perfectionist always want to become big shots. Please let me know how to encourage him by giving him some example.
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Hello Jackson6612,

There are no loosers here in the world!;) What your cousin needs is to have confidence on himself, maybe you should remind him all those years he was successful!..I guess he still uses the same studying method as he used to use when he a child! You can memorize everything and get really high marks if you are still small but not when you grow up, he has to understand first or he will forget everything!;) Encourage him by telling him the reality, that he is not a looser, he just need a lil of confidence, he is able to do it..and so on. Let him know that you are with him, that whenever he needs some help you will be there!;)

Hope this helps..Emotion: smile


Hello Jackson!
My very thoughts are that one should study for his own education, for the pleasure to learn things; one will ever meet someone who's better than himself as regards marks, studying ability, cleverness, but one will even meet also people who are worse than himself. The secret is trying to understand our own limits and trying to accept them.
When I started the University I wasn't so good at maths, physics, chemistry; everyone in my class was better then me, and I started thinking: "I am a stupid mind". But I didn't give up. Besides I've studied hard and guess what? I've been graduated with the full marks, while those who I considered like geniuses didn't obtain the full marks. This has been a very good experience which increased my self-esteem. Tell your cousin to be strong and never give up, because if it's been like that for me (a very normal student) it would be like this even for him Emotion: smile

Best of luck!
Dear Francesca and Pucca,

Thank you so much for taking time to reply. Well, you are right he must study otherwise he will be loser throughout his life. But there is a problem. He was 17 when he did his 10th grade and now he is 22. If he starts studying now then he will need aproximately 2 years to clear his 11th and 12th grade. That means by then he will be 24. How should I make him realise that age doesn't matter? I don't know myself whether age matters or not. He is a real genius because many of his science teachers told me. Please let me know of any idea you have.
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Dear Jackson6612,

Age doesn't matter;)! What is really important is the person's brain:)
...as long as he enjoys studying, it's great! It's never late for that!:D
The more he learn, the better for him!

Good luck!