Hi guys,

There's a suggestion that is made to make the following paragraph better and there's an explanation that says the suggestion is incorrect by some reason.

My question is about the explantion, esp. the part marked in blue color.

What do you think is the best meaing of it in this context?

( "Improper" or "wrong/reverse order"? )

Thank you very much for your concern!



Hypertension, or high blood pressure as it is commonly known, is the “silent killer” that

affects the lives of more than tens of millions of Americans each year. A famous doctor, whose work has done much to uncover an understanding of high blood pressure, says that hypertension means that there is too much pressure in the bloodstream. It is like a garden hose with a too-tight nozzle. Either the nozzle or the hose bursts, which is exactly what happens to blood vessels when the pressure is too great. If it is in the brain, you have a stroke. If the vessel bursts in the heart, you have a heart attack. Preventing these problems is easier than curing them.

* Suggestion: It should follow sentence 1.

This is incorrect because sentence 6 would be out of order so early in the selection.
Hi Pb;

There is a suggestion that the sentence in red (#6) be moved to follow the first sentence in the paragraph.

There is an objection to this edit because moving the sentence would disrupt the logical flow of thought in the paragraph. The order of 1, 6, 2, ...
is improper.

A-Emotion: stars
In my opinion, the original order as shown here is the correct one.

The comments with asterisks are confusing. What are the antecedents of "it" and "it"? Which is sentence 1.?

If you place the underlined sentence after the sentence which now follows it, the order of sentences in the paragraph would be wrong and improper. The first two sentences would be in reverse order from what they should be.
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 AlpheccaStars's reply was promoted to an answer.
Sorry, I missed the "sentence 6" bit. Thanks, Emotion: star.

Yes, "improper" is the best choice of the three descriptions.
The term "reverse order" would apply to two consecutive sentences which should be interchanged with each other.
If you use the order 1-6-2, swapping one and six will still leave you with an improper order. (6-1-2)

"Out of order" does not necessarily mean "reverse order," but "reverse order would always be "out of order." (unless it's a correction) Emotion: big smile
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