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Dear (name of the person):

I first learned about (name of the school) through my school counselor while I was studying in Vietnam at a school with an American-based curriculum called Saigon South Int'l School. I'm a Belgian citizen with half Korean origins from my mother. My dream would be to study at (name of the school) to obtain a BBA in Int'l hotel management with either hotel design and project management or culinary business management.

I lived for seven years in Ho Chi Minh City, Vietnam where I studied English for seven years in an American International School. I have recently moved back to my home country where I have continued to follow most of my classes in English through the British English immersion program provided by my school and also to improve my French.

I have met with the Dean of (name of the school) during a university gathering back in Viet Nam during which we conversed in both English and Spanish and where he assured me that I was the perfect candidate to excel in the industry. Baking is one of my deepest passions and hobby and I would like to have the opportunity to expand my horizons in the various areas of the hospitality industry. I wish to be able to work in some of the best hotels of the world as I love to travel and am very open to contact with others. Furthermore, I also dream to one day be able to open and manage my own restaurants and/or hotels. I really believe that (name of the school) is the perfect place for me as I know that it would provide me with the necessary skills to achieve my goals.

To conclude, thanks to the world-renowned quality of education and to the wondrous location of (name of the school), I would benefit from amazing working conditions. Moreover, I strongly believe that I have the leadership and motivation needed to excel as a student at your school and in the hospitality industry. I really look forward to meeting you in person on the 24th of September and thank you for your time and consideration.
Sincerely yours,
(my name)

please help me, give me advice and don't hesitate to correct. Your help will be greatly appreciated...
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Hi Lilou04; I've made some suggestions on your essay.

Dear (name of the person):I first learned about (name of the school) through my school counselor while I was studying in Vietnam at a school with an American-based curriculum called Saigon South Int'l School. I'm a Belgian citizen with half Korean origins from my mother. (This sentence is kind of mixed up. Do you mean something like this? My father is Belgian, and my mother Korean. So even though I have an EU passport, I consider myself a world citizen. )My dream would be to study at (name of the school) to obtain a BBA in Int'l hotel management with either hotel design and project management or culinary business management. I lived for seven years in Ho Chi Minh City, Vietnam where I studied English for seven years in an American International School. (This repeats your earlier information. Can you combine it in the first sentence?) I have recently moved back to my home country where I have continued to follow most of my classes in English through the British English immersion program provided by my school and also to improve my (mother tongue, ?) French. I have met with the Dean of (name of the school) during a university gathering back in Viet Nam. during which We conversed in both English and Spanish and where he assured me that I was the perfect candidate to excel in the industry. (In addition to my love of languages, my hobby of) Baking is one of my deepest passions. and hobby and (You might say something like: My love of languages and culinary arts combine with my experiences living in different cultures to form my aspiration for a career in International hospitality.) I would like to have the opportunity to expand my horizons in the various areas of the hospitality industry. I wish to be able to work in some of the best hotels of the world as I love to travel and am very open to contact with others. Furthermore, I also dream to one day be able to open and manage my own restaurants and/or hotels. I really believe that (name of the school) is the perfect place for me as I know that it would provide me with the necessary skills to achieve my goals.
To conclude, thanks to the world-renowned quality of education and to the wondrous location of (name of the school), I would benefit from amazing working conditions(? are you going to have a job there as well as being a student?). Moreover, I strongly believe that I have the leadership skills and motivation needed to excel as a student at your school and in the hospitality industry. I really look forward to meeting you in person on the 24th of September. Thank you for your time and consideration.
Sincerely yours,(my name)
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wow, thank you for those amazing suggestions =) and my mother is korean but she has a belgian nationality as she was adopted by belgians when she was 4... so yeah i don't know how to explain that without going into the explication of my whole family tree XD what i mean is that she isn't EXACTLY korean... she doesnt speak it and hasnt been there since she was adopted, she doesnt remember anything... and the problem about combining the sentence that repeats the info is that it's the first sentence of my second paragraph =/ i followed the conversation on one of the discussions in this forum and followed the advice given for the contents i needed to concentrate on for each paragraph and it helped me alot.... but about combining it, I'm not sure how to do it as I don't want my intro to be too long...
oh and yes I would be working as well as we do internships for about half of the year, i dont know if that counts...
Here are the changes i've brought to my text. it should be the final draft unless somebody has some final suggestions as I have to send it today.... but apart from that, thank you for all your help!!!! i really appreciate it =)

I first learned about (name of the school) through my school counselor while I was studying in Viet Nam at a school with an American-based curriculum called Saigon South Int'l School. I am half Korean and half Belgian and even though I have an EU passport, I consider myself a world citizen. My dream would be to study at (name of the school) to obtain a BBA honors in Int'l hotel management with either hotel design and project management or culinary business management.
I lived in Ho Chi Minh City, Vietnam for seven years where I studied English for seven years in an American International School. I have recently moved back to my home country where I have continued to follow most of my classes in English through the British English immersion program provided by my school and also to improve my mother tongue, French.
I met with the Dean of (name of the school)during a university gathering back in Viet Nam. We conversed in both English and Spanish and he assured me that I was the perfect candidate to excel in the industry. My love of languages and of the culinary arts combined with my experiences living in different cultures is what formed my aspiration for a career in International hospitality. I would like to have the opportunity to expand my horizons in the various areas of the hospitality industry. I wish to be able to work in some of the best hotels of the world as I love to travel and am very open to contact with others. Furthermore, I also dream to one day be able to open and manage my own restaurants and/or hotels. I really believe that (name of the school) is the perfect place for me as I know that it would provide me with the necessary skills to achieve my goals.
To conclude, thanks to the world-renowned quality of education and to the wondrous location of (name of the school), I would benefit from amazing studying conditions. Moreover, I strongly believe that I have the leadership skills and motivation needed to excel as a student at your school and in the hospitality industry. I really look forward to meeting you in person on the 24th of September. Thank you for your time and consideration.
Sincerely yours,
(my name)
Students: We have free audio pronunciation exercises.
Lilou04I lived in Ho Chi Minh City, Vietnam for seven years where I studied English in an American International School.
seven + seven (deleted one)
Lilou04My love of languages and of the culinary arts combined (main verb) with my experiences living in different cultures to form is what formed my aspiration for a career in International hospitality.
The structure of this sentence is: A and B combined with C to form D...
Lilou04I would like to have the opportunity to expand my horizons in the various areas of the hospitality industry. I wish to be able to work in some of the best hotels of the world as I love to travel and am very open to contact with others. Furthermore, I also dream to one day be able to open and manage my own restaurants and/or hotels. I really believe that (name of the school) is the perfect place for me as I know that it would provide me with the necessary skills to achieve my goals.
There are a few too many I want, I hope, I love.... (too many I's)

Suggestion - something that diminishes the egotism, but retains the enthusiasm:

A degree from (school) would expand my horizons to all aspects of the hospitality industry. That would open the doors for me to work abroad in some of the best hotels of the world which are always situated in fascinating cultures and places. And that is a stepping stone to my ultimate dream: to open a boutique hotel with a culinary arts theme... (example)