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As the fast-growing development of technological devices and the digital natives, or been known as Generation Z at the moment are increasingly not engrossing of directly visiting those places. In my point of view, I disagree completely the assumption above and would be reasoning meticulously in both sides.


The first imperative feature when it comes to a local museum is regrading its popularity it gains throughout the time. Firstly, by vastly broadcasting online of those local places in mainstream and alternative media might intentionally capture people attention about the magnitude of knowing history as well as stimulate the natural curiosity of children to go the museums. Secondly, logically, in the purpose of gaining the significant amount of subsidy from top philanthropists affects directly and vitally to jobs of people work there. As far as I know that many museums are no longer available in many developing countries for their financial suffering.


Next, it is necessary to stage several plays annually in order to assimilate the spirit of national figures who painfully sacrificed for the liberty and freedom of that nation. Because every province dignifies its heroes and soldiers, the pupils of all ages ought to learn to appreciate the aftermath gifts that they got. Finally, the cultural existence would always be passed down to future generations to continuously operate those historical places. Then, for the long-term benefits of the museum itself, it should be wildly comprehended that the belief of embracing those moral values by the youngsters is utterly significant.


In conclusion, I wholeheartedly respect the uniqueness of each local museum even when those places might be shut down for any particular justifications, owing to all the reasons that I have stated above.

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As the fast-growing development of technological devices and the digital natives, or been known as Generation Z at the moment are increasingly not engrossing of directly visiting those places. That is not a complete sentence. Ii is a fragment and contains grammatical errors. Also, it does not relate very well to the topic question. Your first sentence should directly address the question presented. "Digital native" is not a good phrase. "engrossing" is not used correctly, and "those places" lacks an antecedent. Please start over again. The question is not about technology, so do not include technology in your essay.

Most of your essay does not address the topic.

In my point of view, I disagree completely with the assumption above and would be reasoning meticulously in both sides.

I improper thesis statement. Never mention your essay, your writing, or what you are going to tell the reader in a formal essay. Write a thesis statement. That is the main point (conclusion) of the essay.


The first imperative feature (wrong word) when it comes to a local museum is regrading (wrong word) its popularity it gains throughout the time. Firstly, First, by vastly (wrong word) broadcasting online (off topic. The topic is not about internet or online or technology.) word) of those local places in mainstream and alternative media might intentionally capture people (wrong form) attention about the magnitude (wrong word) of knowing history as well as stimulate the natural curiosity of children to go the museums. (off topic.) Secondly, Second, logically, in (wrong word) the purpose of gaining a the significant amount of subsidy from top philanthropists affects directly and vitally to jobs (Ungrammatical sentence structure. Also, this is not related to the essay question.) of people work there. As far as I know that many museums are no longer available (wrong word) in many developing countries for (wrong word) their financial suffering.


Next, it is necessary to stage several plays annually in order to assimilate the spirit of national figures who painfully sacrificed for the liberty and freedom of that nation. (Off-topic) Because every province dignifies its heroes and soldiers, the pupils of all ages ought to learn to appreciate the aftermath gifts that they got. Finally, the cultural existence would always be passed down to future generations to continuously operate those historical places. Then, for the long-term benefits of the museum itself, it should be wildly comprehended that the belief of embracing those moral values by the youngsters is utterly significant.


This conclusion does not match the essay topic. You need to carefully consider the question and give an answer that is good for that question. You will get a very low score on "task completion."


In conclusion, I wholeheartedly respect the uniqueness of each local museum even when those places might be shut down for any particular justifications, owing to all the reasons that I have stated above.

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Subject: Please review my IELTS essay

Message body:
Topic: Museums and art galleries should concertrate on local works rather than showing the cultures and artworks from other countries. To what extent do you argee or disagree?

My essay:

(Your text here...)
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