Hi

I've written a poem (well, sort of!) this morning as I couldn't sleep at all. I've never written a poem in my life. So could anyone please have a look at it and tell me what mistakes I've made there? Thank you.

“Tale of a wretched soul”

I miss your smile
that lit up your face
when you saw me.
It’s not possible now.

I miss your laughter
that was like breeze in the summer.
It’s not possible now.

I miss your kisses
that breathed life into me.
It’s not possible now.

I miss your lovely eyes
that burned a hole in my heart.
It’s not possible now.

Am I a broken toy
that has lost your attention?
Am I a stale joke
that you’ve heard a hundred times?
Am I an experiment
that went awry?

I long to hold you in my arms
I long to feel your hair on my face when I wake up in the morning
I long to be your side when I finally close my eyes
I long to share my dreams, joy, sorry and my life.

I love you more than myself, honey
but don’t care about me.
I’m just a lonely traveller
desperately speeding ahead on the one-way street of love
not knowing a ten-wheeler called ‘time’
waiting to crush me on the next stretch.
I like the first five stanzas very much, 2Cx0.5, but the last two break the mood and degenerate into lovelorn drivel. I suggest you delete everything after awry. Add a new, short, final couplet.

The title also is quite smarmy-- think of a more original one.
Thank you so much for your comment Mister Micawber.