hi this is my sop.

The most remarkable attribute of mine, has been an inherent curiosity to imbibe new things. My keen interest for learning new ideas, when combined with my inner desire to reach a degree of excellence in every piece of work I perform, enabled me to acquire significant knowledge on various aspects of technology and finance, as well as leading me through a successful educational career. The immense scope of innovation and the unbounded possibility of creation of new ideas further stimulated my interests.
Right from childhood I was fascinated by computers and wanted to know how they work and what all one could do with them. Having studied computers in school and a deep interest in mathematics had developed the necessary analytical skill set. Computer Science as subject seemed to align well with my desired goals. Securing a good percentage in my Senior Secondary Board Examination gave me the opportunity to study Computer Science in College of Engineering, Pune.
During my undergraduate study, I acquired sound theoretical background in Computer Science through my rigorous program at College of Engineering, Bharati Vidyapeeth University, Pune. I had developed a penchant for subjects like Theory of Computer Science (TCS), logic design, database management and engineering mathematics. Theory of computer science as my introduction to the subject of computers was highly engaging and fascinated me thoroughly. The remaining aforementioned subjects were extremely enriching. I scored good marks in almost all my subjects. I received 77/100 in TCS, 65/100 in logic design and 63 in engineering mathematics.
During my undergraduate tenure, I made a project for library management in COBOL, hospital management in C++ and Network intrusion detection in java being my final year project. Besides this, I had also given a presentation on VOIP (voice over internet protocol).
Apart from academics, I was actively involved in extra curricular activities too. I was the bassist in the college band, captain of the soccer team and was appointed as the corporate marketing head for the national level college fest BHARATIYAM 2009. I had won various prizes in different band competitions. I secured the 1st position at almost all the major events of the season. My achievements were featured in the national newspaper supplement.
I have always been interested in mathematics and this interest reached its peaks during my under graduation tenure. I have always wondered how the global financial system works and how everything has been handled. I was also witness to one of the great recessions of the century and it further nourished my interest. I was too inquisitive of how it happened and how it could have been prevented. All this can be understood either in a layman's language or in a professional's lingo. And both the ways of understanding are poles apart. It is this distance in the understanding that motivated me to pursue Finance to an unbelievable extent. I eagerly look forward to maximizing my skills and satisfy my interests in the field of finance.
Thus, I would like to do my Masters in Financial Engineering because it provides the right platform for me to achieve what I want. It is an intermediate course between MBA and engineering. Subsequently, it will allow me to make the best possible use of my engineering skills acquired till date and apply them in the field of finance. Object oriented programming, a major part of this course, was my main interest during under graduation. I am thus confident my honed skills and academic interests are appropriate for pursuing MS in Financial Engineering.
Post Master's, I intend to work in an industry where I can utilize the knowledge gained so far. I have always has a knack for gaining more and more knowledge but I strongly feel that without practical application, theoretical knowledge is a waste. I harbour the desire to be a successful financial analyst one day.
I have the loving support of my family in this endeavour. They have always guided and encouraged me to pursue my dreams and search for new horizons. They have always supported me through everything I have done so far. They have encouraged free flow of ideas and pushed me to realize them in practicality. They constantly guide me in the right directions in my life and help me in making important decisions. I have also left a mark though my enthusiastic participation in every event, seminar and technical festivals held in my college as a participant and organizer. These diverse interests have not only given me a sound and healthy disposition, but have made me punctual, committed and added to my stamina and patience.
To conclude I would say that the essence of university education lies in the synergetic relationship between the individual and the university itself. Hence, I wish to carry my further studies at Baruch College, City University of New York____ University in the US, as I am aware of the opportunities the country provides to academic scholars. The universities provide modern and latest means to enhance knowledge theoritically and practically. I also feel that extensive work being carried out at your University under the guidance of scholarly professor Greg Ciresi and Martin Helm will provide immense opportunity to learn and dwell into my field of interest. I look forward to enhancing my domain knowledge by taking up a course like Masters of Financial Engineering and interacting with students from all over the globe, of different ethnicity, international exposure and above all, a very safe and healthy working environment for all of its students, makes this as the best place for pursuing my Masters. I am confident that my hard work, aptitude and competency will enable me to contribute to my field of knowledge extensively.

Best regards,
sidharth sood.
Ouch! Far too long and hyperbolic. Cut it 'way down, Sidharth, to about half that length,and make it more simple, modest and straightforward.
thanks . let me see where i can cut things up.really appreciate ur help.
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hi this is the edited one.please comment

The finance program in the US is ideal fit for my ambitions because of its emphasis on finance, industry oriented enviornment and its over all academic excellence.Particularly Exposure to the corporations and the financial services industry in the US,I am aware of the opportunities the country provides to academic scholars. The universities provide modern and latest means to enhance knowledge theoritically and practically. I also feel that extensive work being carried out at your University will provide immense opportunity to learn and dwell into my field of interests.

Right from childhood I was fascinated by computers and wanted to know how they work and what all one could do with them. Having studied computers in school and a deep interest in mathematics had developed the necessary analytical skill set. Computer Science as subject seemed to align well with my desired goals. My passion of mathematics and computers led me to choose Computer Engineering as my undergraduate major.

Apart from academic interests, I also have a diverse experience in extra-curricular activities.Apart from academics, I was actively involved in extra curricular activities too. I was appointed as the corporate marketing head for the national level college fest BHARATIYAM 2009. .I also have performed volunteer voluntary work in the Allahabad bank (Head Office, solan) by networking their computers and installing software applications.I am a regular reader of the Financial Times, New York Times, Times of India and PC World Magazine, enjoy keeping up with current affairs and business news. I actively participate in recreational activities including debate and sports competitions as well.

I have always been interested in mathematics and always enjoyed and been strong in areas that require problem solving, analytical and mathematical skills.and I am anxious to combine the knowledge of, and aptitude for, these skills with my interest in finance. I was also witness to one of the great recessions of the century and it further nourished my interest. I was too inquisitive of how it happened and how it could have been prevented.All this can be understood either in a layman's language or in a professional's lingo. And both the ways of understanding are poles apart. It is this distance in the understanding that motivated me to pursue Finance to an unbelievable extent. I eagerly look forward to maximizing my skills and satisfy my interests in the field of finance.
Thus, I would like to do my Masters in Financial Engineering because it provides the right platform for me to achieve what I want. Subsequently, it will allow me to make the best possible use of my engineering skills acquired till date and apply them in the field of finance. Object oriented programming, a major part of this course, was my main interest during under graduation. I am thus confident my honed skills and academic interests are appropriate for pursuing MS in Financial Engineering.

Post Master's, I intend to work in an industry where I can utilize the knowledge gained so far. I have always has a knack for gaining more and more knowledge but I strongly feel that without practical application, theoretical knowledge is a waste. My initial goal immediately after graduation is to obtain a rigorous, demanding and rewarding position in this profession. I hope to gain practical corporate experience in areas such as The knowledge and skills in turn will help me to achieve my short-term career goals to manage capital management, generate funds, perform mergers and acquisitions, risk management, pricing and sales strategies for stability and maximum returns on capital. and ensure future economic stability for corporation, or help financial services industry make the right financial decisions that will result in economic stability and high returns. In the long-term, my corporate such knowledge, skills and experience will help me assist Government of India in designing, implementing and monitoring financial policies, planning and executing the financing initiatives, and interfacing with the financial community and investors. To this end, I would also like to gain knowledge in the fields of investment analysis, financial planning, strategic finance, international finance and global financial markets during my graduate studies in the US.
I have underlined problem areas and struck out unnecessary verbiage:

The finance program in the US is ideal fit for my ambitions because of its emphasis on finance, industry oriented enviornment and its over all academic excellence.Particularly Exposure to the corporations and the financial services industry in the US,I am aware of the opportunities the country provides to academic scholars. The universities provide modern and latest means to enhance knowledge theoritically and practically. I also feel that extensive work being carried out at your University will provide immense opportunity to learn and dwell into my field of interests.

Right from childhood I was fascinated by computers and wanted to know how they work and what all one could do with them. Having studied computers in school and a deep interest in mathematics had developed the necessary analytical skill set. Computer Science as subject seemed to align well with my desired goals. My passion of mathematics and computers led me to choose Computer Engineering as my undergraduate major.

Apart from academic interests, I also have a diverse experience in extra-curricular activities.Apart from academics, I was actively involved in extra curricular activities too. I was appointed as the corporate marketing head for the national level college fest BHARATIYAM 2009. .I also have performed volunteer voluntary work in the Allahabad bank (Head Office, solan) by networking their computers and installing software applications.I am a regular reader of the Financial Times, New York Times, Times of India and PC World Magazine, enjoy keeping up with current affairs and business news. I actively participate in recreational activities including debate and sports competitions as well.
I have always been interested in mathematics and always enjoyed and been strong in areas that require problem solving, analytical and mathematical skills.and I am anxious to combine the knowledge of, and aptitude for, these skills with my interest in finance. I was also witness to one of the great recessions of the century and it further nourished my interest in. I was too inquisitive of how it happened and how it could have been prevented.All this can be understood either in a layman's language or in a professional's lingo. And both the ways of understanding are poles apart. It is this distance in the understanding that motivated me to pursue Finance to an unbelievable extent. I eagerly look forward to maximizing my skills and satisfy my interests in the field of finance.
Thus, I would like to do my Masters in Financial Engineering because it provides the right platform for me to achieve what I want. Subsequently, it will allow me to make the best possible use of my engineering skills acquired till date and apply them in the field of finance. Object oriented programming, a major part of this course, was my main interest during under graduation. I am thus confident my honed skills and academic interests are appropriate for pursuing MS in Financial Engineering.
Post Master's, I intend to work in an industry where I can utilize the knowledge gained so far. I have always has a knack for gaining more and more knowledge but I strongly feel that without practical application, theoretical knowledge is a waste. My initial goal immediately after graduation is to obtain a rigorous, demanding and rewarding position in this profession. I hope to gain practical corporate experience in areas such as The knowledge and skills in turn will help me to achieve my short-term career goals to manage capital management, generation of funds, perform mergers and acquisitions, risk management, pricing and sales strategies for stability and maximum returns on capital. and ensure future economic stability for corporation, or help financial services industry make the right financial decisions that will result in economic stability and high returns. In the long-term, my corporate such knowledge, skills and experience will help me I hope to assist Government of India in designing, implementing and monitoring financial policies, planning and executing the financing initiatives, and interfacing with the financial community and investors. To this end, I would also like to gain knowledge in the fields of investment analysis, financial planning, strategic finance, international finance and global financial markets during my graduate studies in the US.
okey ill modify the passage and post it back .really greatful for your efforts.
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I would say I am impressed, really IMPRESSED!!!! have you already applied to the university? what are the results? I think they might be good Emotion: smile