It is a common belief that letting children control their own budget from an early age is one of the best ways to teach them how to manage money. In my opinion, I partly agree with this idea, and in this essay, I will discuss it.
First of all, if parents give their kids a chance to take control of their own budget, they would be more responsible for it. They will be aware of the value of money and its benefits; therefore, they will realize that it is not easy to have because of their respect for it.
Whereby, not only at present but also in the future, children will become more independent. Since they are allowed to control their personal budget, they will be less reliant on parents’ finances. When they grow up, they will pay justifiably and will not spend wastefully on useless things. That is called “smart-consumer”. This is very important during the course of their development and maturity because of the fact that while other parents are struggling with their kids relying too much on them although they are adolescents, children who were able to control their money since they were small won’t make their mother and father disappointed.
However, parents should put their kids controlling money under the microscope because not all children are capable of discerning the right uses of money. Accordingly, parents should teach them thoroughly how to manage their personal budget and should consider stopping letting kids spend money if necessary.
In conclusion, it is undeniably that letting children control their own budget from an early age is one of the best ways to teach them how to manage money. Nevertheless, parents may have to choose another way if that idea is not suitable for their kids.
Hello Anonymous;
If you want my feedback, you will have to register here. I do not spend time and effort on people who don't take the few seconds of time to register. All these anonymous posts are all lumped together and do not reflect the work of individual students.
Registration is completely free. There is no cost. Also, if you give an email address (not required) you can choose to get notifications when someone replies to your post.
If you already have an account, please log in.
Please post essays, paragraphs, dialogues and other writing in the essay forum so a moderator does not have to move your post.
https://www.englishforums.com/English/EssayReportCompositionWriting/Forum9.htm
Please do not put the essay instructions in the "Subject" line.
Put it with your answer in the message body.
Subject: Please review my IELTS essay
Message body:
Topic: One of the best ways to teach children to manage their money is to let them control their budget from an early age. To what extent do you agree or disagree with the statement?
My essay:
(Your text here...)
---------------------
Is your userid: Paint tile 486? https://www.englishforums.com/user/cqlhr/profile.htm
Please use only one account.
Students: We have free audio pronunciation exercises.
It is a common belief that letting children have their own money to spend control their own budget (Budget is not money. A budget is a plan which lists income and spending in various categories. ) from an early age is one of the best ways to teach them how to manage money. In my opinion, (Agree is an opinion. "in my opinion" is redundant.) I partly agree with this idea, and in this essay, I will discuss it.
First of all, if parents give their kids (Kids is extremely informal. Avoid it in formal writing.) a chance to take control of their own budget, (Not a good word choice. See the figure below.) they would be more responsible for it. They will be aware of the value of money and its benefits; therefore, they will realize that it is not easy to have (wrong word) because of their respect for it. (That does not make sense. I don't know what you mean..)
Whereby, (wrong usage) not only at present but also (wrong usage - become is a change over time. It is not something at one point in time.) in the future, children will become more independent. Since they are allowed to control their personal budget, they will be less reliant on their parents’ finances. When they grow up, they will pay (wrong usage) justifiably and will not spend wastefully on useless things. That is called being a “smart-consumer”. This is very important during the course of their development and maturity because of the fact that while other parents are struggling with their kids relying too much on them (You have lost control of this sentence here. I cannot figure out what you are trying to say.) although they are adolescents, children who were able to control their money since they were small won’t (wrong usage. Do not use contractions in formal writing.) make disappoint their mother and father disappointed. (wrong usage)
However, parents should monitor put their kids buying habits controlling money under the microscope (unnatural usage) because not all children are capable of discerning the right uses of money. Accordingly, parents should teach them thoroughly how to manage their personal budget (You repeat this word, incorrectly used, many times.) and should consider stopping letting kids spend money if necessary.
In conclusion, it is undeniably (wrong usage. Also avoid these "dummy-it" clauses. They are practically useless and a waste of words. ) that letting children control their own budget from an early age is one of the best ways to teach them how to manage money. Nevertheless, parents may have to choose another way if that idea is not suitable for their kids.
This illustrates a budget. It is far too complicated for young children! Using "budget" rather than "allowance" or "spending money" or "pocket money" shows that you do not understand how the word "budget" is used very well.
