Some think that testing new medicines on animals is necessary while others believe it is not right. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
P/s: I would be greateful if you could identify my weak and strong areas and give me some advice on how to improve them.
Human treatment of animals is a highly emotive issue. People hold different viewpoints regarding whether animal experimentation is essential or arguably immoral. Despite moral standards and health concerns, animal testing is of paramount importance to medical breakthroughs.
Detractors of animal exploitation espouse animal rights and health hazards for society. Animals have physiological functions like humans and therefore have rights. More advanced mammals with complex nervous systems, including chimpanzees and monkeys, are susceptible to fear and pain. It is, therefore, intuitively heartrending to witness sentient beings experiencing agonies presented by the effects of trial drugs, medications, or surgical procedures. Furthermore, experimenting with medicines on animals may also pose a threat to human health. Since animals might transmit zoonotic diseases, scientists working with them might be infected. As a result, these viruses later spread to the communities, threatening public health.
Proponents of animal experimentation cite human rights and the importance of medical development for humanity. Indeed, history has shown that countless newly-made drugs and vaccines need to be applied primarily to animals; otherwise, humans have to suffer the unwanted side effects that these preventative medicines might cause. Evidence for this is the smallpox epidemic outbreak in the 1800s when several experiments on cows were needed for the successful production of smallpox vaccines. Had it not been for such experiments, there would have been a huge loss in human population. Another reason for animal testing is the precedence of human rights over animal rights. This is because animals are not humans and do not have human rights. Therefore, moral standards should not hinder scientific and medical progress.
In conclusion, barring moral dilemmas and health hazards, human rights are superior, and therefore animal exploitation is necessary for medical advances. These, including new disease prevention and treatment breakthrough, are paramount to the existence of humanity.
Watch this 5-part video course on how IELTS essays are scored. The purpose is for you to understand how IELTS essays are scored.
I am not promoting Adam's book. (You do not have to buy the book. I bought it, though.) You can get all the main ideas from the videos. Each video is about 15-20 minutes. He gives excellent advice on how to get the best score for IELTS writing.
In the first video, at 11:15, Adam says "The easier it is for the examiner to read and understand your writing, the higher your score will be."
Part 1: https://youtu.be/kv7kdbw4_fU Introduction
Part 2: https://youtu.be/TnjKk2Hng4A Grammatical Range and accuracy
Part 3: https://youtu.be/LLJYNEsGdPI Lexical Resource (vocabulary)
Part 4: https://youtu.be/iurqANTFj2M Cohesion and Coherence
Part 5: https://youtu.be/oCQvsrLw4Cc Task Response.
Human (Your first word is incorrect. You meant to write "humane".) treatment of animals is a highly controversial emotive issue. People hold different viewpoints regarding whether using animals to test new drugs animal experimentation (You have to make a strong link to the task instructions.) is essential or arguably immoral. Despite moral standards and health concerns, (read the instructions. They say "give your own opinion" Be clear and straightforward in your answer. Your answer is rather obscure and requires "reading between the lines". Here is an example) my opinion is that animal testing is of paramount importance to medical breakthroughs and must be permitted, but regulated to avoid abuse.
Detractors (wrong word) Objectors to of animal exploitation espouse animal rights and health hazards for society. Animals have physiological functions are living creatures like humans and therefore have rights. More advanced mammals with complex nervous systems, including chimpanzees and monkeys, feel are susceptible to fear and pain. It is, therefore, intuitively heartrending to witness them sentient beings (Sentient means self-aware) experiencing agonies presented (wrong word) caused by the effects of trial drugs, medications, or surgical procedures. Furthermore, experimenting with medicines on animals may also pose a threat to human health. Since animals might transmit zoonotic diseases, scientists working with them might be infected. As a result, these viruses later spread to the communities, threatening public health.
Proponents of animal experimentation cite human rights and the importance of medical development for humanity. Indeed, history has shown that countless newly-made drugs and vaccines need to be tried for efficacy on applied primarily to animals; otherwise, humans have to suffer the unwanted side effects that these preventative medicines (Actually, they do animal trials to determine if the drug has any effect on preventing or curing some disease. Animal trials also determine the dosage levels and potential side effects.) might cause. Evidence for this is the smallpox epidemic outbreak in the 1800s when several experiments on cows (You have incorrect information. There were no experiments on cows. Cows were involved, though. The observation was that milkmaids and dairy farmers seldom died from smallpox. Their immune systems were boosted by being exposed to and contracting cowpox, which was caused by a related, but less virulent pathogen. The first smallpox vaccines were created from extracts of the pus from cowpox infections. People vaccinated suffered from cowpox, but then they were immune to the much worse smallpox.) were needed for the successful production of smallpox vaccines. Had it not been for such experiments, there would have been a huge loss in human population. Another reason for animal testing is the precedence of human rights over animal rights. This is because animals are not humans and do not have human rights. Therefore, moral standards should not hinder scientific and medical progress.
In conclusion, barring moral dilemmas and health hazards, human rights are superior, and therefore animal exploitation is necessary for medical advances. These, including new disease prevention and treatment breakthrough, are paramount to the existence of humanity.
VieteP/s: I would be grateful if you could identify my weak and strong areas and give me some advice on how to improve them.
Many students think that if they use high-level vocabulary and exotic phrases, they will get a higher band score. This is a false impression. One of the four scoring criteria for Task 2 is "Lexical Resource." A student with a high level of lexical resource not only knows many words, but they know how to use them effectively. Here are the descriptors:
Band score 7:
- uses a sufficient range of vocabulary to allow some flexibility and precision
- uses less common lexical items with some awareness of style and collocation
- may produce occasional errors in word choice, spelling and/or word formation
Band score 6:
- uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task
- attempts to use less common vocabulary but with some inaccuracy
- makes some errors in spelling and/or word formation, but they do not impede communication
You try very hard to make "sophisticated" phrases, but in that your writing is awkward due to odd and unnatural usage. It is not enough to know a word from the dictionary; you have to use it correctly in a sentence. So it is much better to use vocabulary you know well than to make a lot of errors with words you are uncertain about.
Next, make sure that your information is accurate and reasonable.
The smallpox vaccine was developed and tested by experiments on people, not cows.
I would have used the experiments on dogs that proved that injections of insulin (normally produced in the pancreas) prevented death from diabetes. Diabetes used to be a death sentence. Millions of people suffer from it today, but do not die.
The experimenters removed the pancreas from their dogs. The dogs developed symptoms of diabetes. That experiment isolated the root cause of diabetes to be something that was produced by that organ.
https://educationalgames.nobelprize.org/educational/medicine/insulin/discovery-insulin.html
Thanks!
Uh in his video about lexical resources, Adam says that phrasal verbs and idioms should be used but aren't they considered informal and idiomatic in academic writings?
Also, do you have a list of common mistakes in writing essays? I want to avoid making them.
VieteUh in his video about lexical resources, Adam says that phrasal verbs and idioms should be used but aren't they considered informal and idiomatic in academic writings?
It depends on the idiom and the verb. Some are very informal and casual, and others have been entrenched in the English language for more than a hundred years and are perfectly acceptable if used in a natural way.
1. These idioms might be considered too informal:
- Passing this exam will be a slam dunk if you pay attention to the scoring criteria.
- That candidate was a shoo in for the position. He was head and shoulders above the others.
- If you don't read the task carefully, you are likely to shoot yourself in the foot.
- I can’t shell anything out for a taxi. I shot my wad at the restaurant.
- After spending all evening in the bar he was three sheets to the wind. His friend drove him home.
2. These are probably very acceptable. It shows your command of the language. The thing to be aware of is that British and American English have different expressions. Your essay needs to be consistent - either 100% American English or 100% British English. My native language is American, but I have lived in places where British is the native language and I have British friends.
- That candidate was selected for the position. He stood head and shoulders above the others.
- The poorest in society are living hand to mouth. They cannot make ends meet.
- If you work hard but do not succeed, it might be a blessing in disguise.
- When discussing the team's issues with the boss, do not beat around the bush; get right to the point.
- People get into debt because they try to keep up with the Joneses.
- In many large corporations, you have to keep your nose to the grindstone and toe the line to be considered for a promotion.
3. We could not express ourselves very well without the use of phrasal verbs! They are very very common. You just have to know about separable versus inseparable verbs.
Do not let me down.
Keep up the good work.
In a confrontation, don't back down.
Turn off the lights when you leave the room.
https://www.englishclub.com/vocabulary/phrasal-verbs-list.php
VieteAlso, do you have a list of common mistakes in writing essays? I want to avoid making them.
I only have some posts regarding common errors I have seen in Task 1 essays. The first post is general advice and some good verbs to use with the different types of tasks.
The second illustrates frequently misused words. Even some IELTS sites use these words in sample essays. Some vocabulary that is excellent for liberal arts contexts (literature, journalism, and debates) is inappropriate for university-level math/science contexts.
Task 1 reveals your ability to summarize data or information in a dispassionate, objective, exact and precise way.
Task 2 reveals your ability to convince the reader that your position is the right one. Task 2 counts twice as much as Task 1 on your overall writing score.
Some people are confused about these two tasks. They evaluate very different writing styles and abilities.