The line graph illustrates how much electricity produced in France by four different sources of power over a period of 30 years

It is clear that while the amount of electricity production by nuclear and renewables energy increased, the opposite was true for thermal and hydroelectric energy. In addition, nuclear was the most important means of generation for most of the period.

In 1980, the amount of electricity produced by renewables power was negligible. The figure for it remained stable from 1980 to 2005 before rising marginally in 2010, stood at 25 terawatt hours. Starting at 50 terawatt hours in 1980, the amount of electricity production provided by nuclear power increased significantly to reach a peak of nearly 450 terawatt hours in 2005, but then slightly decreased to 420 terawatt hours during the last five years.

Looking at the other sources, thermal and hydroelectric power were the main means of generation in 1980, stood at 125 and 70 terawatt hours of electricity respectively. From 1980 to 2000, there was a fluctuation between 60 and 70 terawatt hours in the amount of electricity provided by hydroelectric, followed by a slow decline to 50 terawatt hours in 2005, and then remained stable till the last year. The figure for thermal power experienced a drop to 50 terawatt hours in 1985 and did not change the following 25 years.


Thanks for reviewing my essay !!

Thảo Phạm 1929The line graph ( 1) illustrates how much ( 2) electricity produced in France by four different sources of power over a period of 30 ( 3 ) years

1. Poor choice of verbs.
The verb "illustrate" means "make a picture." Use this verb for maps, diagrams, process flows and other pictorial graphics.

Do NOT use this verb for graphs, pie charts and bar charts.

The verbs to use with these data plots are show, compare, give, plot or present.

For example:

The diagram illustrates the different stages in the process of making cement from raw materials to a finished product.

2. This is a typical problem of ungrammatical clause structure.

You have confused full clauses with reduced relative clauses. These two are correct. Your sentence is not correct.

The line graph plots how much electricity was produced in France.

The line graph plots the amounts of electricity (that were) produced in France.

3. You omitted the punctuation mark at the end of the sentence.

It is clear that (Those are useless words Avoid "it is clear / obvious / evident / apparent" and all such expressions. They give no information to the reader.) While the amount of electricity production by nuclear and renewables renewable energy (Renewables is the noun form. You need the adjective before "energy") increased, the opposite was true for thermal and hydroelectric energy. In addition, nuclear was the dominant source after 1985 (Dominant is a much more impressive word, and "after 1985" is more specific. ) most important means of generation for most of the period.


You missed a very significant point. I would certainly replace the last sentence.

In 1980, the total electricity needs of France was 250 TW-h, which more than doubled to 550 TW-h in 2010. The significant portion of that increase was supplied by nuclear energy, the dominant source after 1985.



In 1980, the amount of electricity produced by renewables power was negligible The figure for it (Avoid the word "figure". It is seldom applicable for Task 1.) and it remained close to zero stable from 1980 to 2005 before rising marginally in 2010 to stood at (Not a very good expression) 25 terawatt hours. Starting at 50 terawatt hours in 1980, the amount of electricity production provided by nuclear power increased significantly to reach a peak of nearly 450 terawatt hours in 2005, but then slightly decreased slightly to 420 terawatt hours during the last five years.

Looking at the other sources, thermal and hydroelectric power were the main means of generation in 1980, stood at 125 and 70 terawatt hours of electricity respectively. From 1980 to 2000, there was a fluctuation (Fluctuation is not a good word to use in most cases.) between 60 and 70 terawatt hours in the amount of electricity the amount provided by hydroelectric power varied in a narrow range between 60 and 70 TW-h; that was followed by a slow decline to 50 terawatt hours in 2005, and then plateaued. remained stable till the last year. The figure (wrong word) production from thermal power experienced a dropped to 50 terawatt hours in 1985 and did not change in the following 25 years.



Please read my advice for Task 1 essays. It explains why "figure" "fluctuate" "experience" and other words are used incorrectly.

IELTS TASK 1: Hints, Tips And Advice

Vocabulary Words For Task 1: Reference Post