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In my opinion, a part-time job is encouraged when you are a freshman or a sophomore because you have enough free time to gain life experiences, get work experience from your job. So, these next steps will give you a hand to get part-time jobs. First of all, you should decide what kind of job you want to do. It must fit your free time and doesn’t disturb your main work. You can depend on your health condition to choose a job more accurately. Second, you need to do research on the company you’re applying for. You absolutely will know how much they pay for you or how many options about working time, how can you apply for a position that you want. Don’t forget to make your resume or curriculum vitae. Third, contact the company through emails if it’s acceptable or directly go to their office to fill in an application form. The following step is to come back home and wait for a call from them. If you’re shortlisted then just prepare yourself, don’t be stressed. Finally, all you need is to go to their job interview in time and be confident to answer questions smoothly. All of these steps ensure that you will effectively get a part-time job fitting you well.tpl

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You missed a lot of conjunctions. If you omit the conjunction, the sentence is not good English. It is not a grammatical sentence.


In my opinion, it is appropriate to work a part-time job is encouraged when you are a freshman or a sophomore because you have enough free time to gain life experiences, (no comma) and get work experience from your job. So, these next steps will give you a hand to get part-time jobs. (More than one?) First of all, you should decide what kind of job you want to do. It must fit your free time class schedule and not doesn’t disturb your studies. main work. You can depend on your health condition (I don't know what you mean. It does not make sense.) to choose a job more accurately. Second, you need to do research on the company you’re applying for. You absolutely will need to know how much they pay for you or how flexible the working hours are many options about working time, and how to can you apply for a the position that you want. Don’t forget to make your resume or curriculum vitae. (You need to make this a step in the process. "Don't forget" is not a valid step.) Third, contact the company through emails (wrong form. email is non-count) if it’s acceptable or directly go to their office to fill in an application form. The following step is to come back home (After sending an email? Don't you do that from home?) and wait for a call from them. If you’re shortlisted then just prepare yourself, and don’t be stressed. Finally, all you need is to go to their job interview in on time and be confident to answer their questions smoothly. All of these steps ensure that you will effectively get a part-time job fitting you well.tpl (What is "tpl"?)

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 AlpheccaStars's reply was promoted to an answer.

Thanks you a lot for helping me and for your feedback and comments