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Hi~I've been to this website for 4 days, and I've read a lot of motivation letters here. people here are very nice and helped a lot of candidates worldwide. Especially Mountain Hiker, almost all the letters I read are modified under your advices. I truly admire u for your time and energy to help people here. I write my letter under your advices to other people and I'll be so glad if u and others can give me some advices. Obviously, I'm not a native speaker, but I'll try my best. So, please help me with this~

Dear Sir or Madam,

I would like to apply to your program MSc in Economics atUniversityofAmsterdamfor the 2012 autumn term.

I am now in my third year at Heilongjiang Institute of Technology inHarbinChina. I grow up in the southern china, but I always want to experience a different kind of life, that is why I am now study in the north. For the past three years in the university, I studied hard for my ultimate career goal of working in an international banking or consulting company.

I was among the top 2 students in my department. During my studies, I earned a GPA of 85%. As a result of my grades, I earned university scholarships for 4 semesters till now. I am very interested in finance, so I read financial newspapers and other magazines when I have the time. But I know quite well that practice makes success, I took part in a lot of competitions especially those economy-related matches.

Just a few months ago, I lead a team to participate in the College Student’s Entrepreneurship Competition. We were asked to organize a mock company and everyone play a role in the company. Since I organized the team and had a lot of experience in such kind of competition, I was selected the chairman of the company. I distribute different assignments to my teammates based on their major and superiority. We finished our business plan two weeks before the deadline and successfully entered into the next round. Then we were asked to make a video about our team and company, it was a big challenge since we do not have the equipments to record. To conquer this, I went to the media department in my institute to borrow the equipments. After 40 minutes talk, I persuaded the teachers there and they even agreed to help us record.

Then there was a holiday and we were told to report the video the day after the holiday. All the staff in the media department took the holiday which means the whole post production work should be finished the day we receive the original video. All my teammates especially I was very worried about the short time. But I realized that as the team leader I should calm down and start to prepare so the others can stop worrying. And it did work. But trouble comes one after another, the member who was supposed to make the post production was assigned another mission by the teacher and I could barely get in touch with him that day. I clearly know that I have to do the post production work myself though I never did it before. But the good thing is I am a quick learner since I was a child. I used the internet to learn and finished the task right before the deadline. All my teammates were happy and amazed at my unbelievable work. But I know that we should always try whatever the problem is and we will at least have a chance.

I want to study atUniversityofAmsterdambecause of your international reputation and excellent academic accomplishments. I got this information on your website that your university continues a tolerant, open and international academic tradition dating back to 1632. I am looking forward to enjoy the atmosphere in your university. Besides,Amsterdamis the commercial, social and artistic heart ofNetherlandsand a prestigious global business centre. Moreover, the graduates of your university always get an enviable job in international firms and other corporations. I am confident that I will meet my career and personal goals while studying atUniversityofAmsterdam. If accepted, my international background and personality will also add diversity to your program.

Thank you for considering my application and I look forward to your acceptance.

Yours sincerely,
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Too busy right now....will look at it later today or tomorrow.
Comments  
Students: Are you brave enough to let our tutors analyse your pronunciation?
Take your time~ I still have at least one month before the application. But I'm looking forward to your reply.
Hello!Mountain Hiker~ I revises my ML today, but I almost changed nothing. I think my ML is sort of like a story, not a letter. Moreover, I'm not sure how to revise it. If u have enough time, please help me~
I come to say that u don't need to revise this. I already asked a company to help me with this. Just in case one day u have the time and revise this but I won't get it.
Students: We have free audio pronunciation exercises.
Apologies Andrew. I have been extremely busy and haven't had any time. I wish you good luck!