Hi people, how are you, I hope your well.  I was hoping that I could find somebody to please check my cover letter for any mistakes and grammer issues.  I would very much appreciate it.  I am replying to the following advert.

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Our client is delighted to offer you this fantastic opportunity to join their Engineering Design Team. A leading manufacturing company within a modern friendly environment are seeking a Trainee CAD Design Engineer.

A superb opportunity where full training is provided as is the potential to progress within the company, who will invest time and money in you.

Skills

- Understanding of Engineering Mathematics

- 3D CAD knowledge

- A preferable understanding of 2D drawing

- Engineering degree

Eventual Duties

- To design the equipment and assemblies required to manufacture volume products to customer requirements.

- Create 3D CAD models & 2D drawings of new components.

Essential Qualifications

- Degree Manufacturing Engineering, Electronic Engineering, Manufacturing Systems, Product Engineering.

We are only able to respond to short listed applicants who will be required to formally register in branch with us, which can take up to 45 minutes, and be able to provide of ID in the form of a passport.

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The below is the current reply I have just come up with, could you be so kind and double check this for me.  My english isn't great but i've given it ago, I always feel like the more I write the more prone I am too mistakes.

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I am writing in reference to the position of ‘Trainee CAD Design Engineer’ as advertised at totaljobs.com on February 24th, 2009.

In the advertisement it is stated I would have an excellent opportunity where I am provided with full training, In return I can offer a strong work ethic, more motivation which I hope would rub off with my fellow co workers, additionally I am a honest, dependable, punctual and loyal.  

As a young and mature individual  I feel that the time and money would be best utilized with me where I would seek every opportunity I can to repay the effort put into developing my skills and be determined to become a leader in the future for the company.

All the desired skills that you have listed in the advertisement I possess, I gained the understanding of engineering mathematics through studying engineering fundamentals modules at the beginning of my degree. Due to the nature of my degree for the three years I have gained extensive experiences of 3D CAD which I very much am excited at the prospect of utilizing in a worked based environment.  I also have knowledge of understanding and interpreting 2D drawings as I have had tutorials requiring me to convert 2D engineering drawings into 3d cad models.  Finally I am happy to inform you that I have just recently graduated from Birmingham City University with a Bachelor of Science in Computer Aided Automotive Design.

The prospect of having to create 3D CAD models & 2D drawings of components is similiar to the tasks I have had to complete for my university work, with this in mind I feel that I am the perfect candidate for fill this position.

Understanding  that this position is based in Ipswich, Suffolk and as I am currently residing in Birmingham I would like to inform you that I am more than happy to relocate if succesful in filling the vacancy.

I am confident that an interview would be a great way to discuss this position further, Enclosed is my curriculum vita, as specified in your advertisement for your review. Should you have any questions or require clarification on any information, please do not hesitate to contact me. I look forward to the possibility of discussing this position in more depth with you in the near future.
I've been working on it now and this is what I've come up with now, do you think its any better.

I am writing in reference to the position of ‘Trainee Technician’ as advertised at totaljobs.com on February 24th, 2009.

In the advertisement it is stated the succesful applicant would have an excellent opportunity where the company would invest time and money to provide full training, In return I can offer a strong work ethic, motivation which I hope would rub off with my fellow co workers, additionally I am a honest, dependable, punctual and loyal. As a young and mature individual I feel that the time and money would be best utilized with me where I would seek every opportunity I can to repay the effort put into developing my skills. My aim eventually would be to become a leader in the future for the company who put the time and effort into me and then passing on the similiar experiences I would have achieved to another trainee.

All the desired skills that you have listed in the advertisement I possess, I gained the understanding of engineering mathematics through studying engineering fundamentals modules at the beginning of my degree. Due to the nature of my degree for the three years I have gained extensive experiences of 3D CAD which I am excited at the prospect of utilizing in a worked based environment. I also have the knowledge of understanding and interpreting 2D drawings as I have attended tutorials requiring me to convert 2D engineering drawings into 3d cad models. Finally I am happy to inform you that I have just recently graduated from Birmingham City University with a Bachelor of Science in Computer Aided Automotive Design.

The prospect of having to create 3D CAD models & 2D drawings of components is similiar to the tasks I have had to complete for my university work, with this in mind I feel that I am the perfect candidate for fill this position.

Understanding that this position is based in Ipswich, Suffolk and as I am currently residing in Birmingham I would like to inform you that I am more than happy to relocate if succesful in filling the vacancy.

I am confident that an interview would be a great way to discuss this position further, enclosed is my curriculum vita. Should you have any questions or require clarification on any information, please do not hesitate to contact me. I look forward to the possibility of discussing this position in more depth with you in the near future.
You wrote: "more motivation which I hope would rub off with my fellow co workers", I would remove this statement entirely. It implys that they need you to fix them and their other workers. The other workers would not feel too good about you if they read that. I suggest that you simply address your good points and experience and not mention other people in any way. Things like your statement can be addressed in an interview and even then I would not say it that way. I would just say that I work well with many different types of people, but only if they ask you. Your actions will speak for themselves once you get hired and will influence others.
You wrote: "As a young and mature individual I feel that the time and money would be best utilized with me where I would seek every opportunity I can to repay the effort put into developing my skills and be determined to become a leader in the future for the company." Although I am not in Britain I know the British are very formal and class concious. Your statement could lead them to believe that you are overly ambitious. And, that you are telling them what to do before you have the job. I would remove this statement also.
You wrote: Understanding that this position is based in Ipswich, Suffolk and as I am currently residing in Birmingham I would like to inform you that I am more than happy to relocate if succesful in filling the vacancy. This statement could be less wordy.In fact, you could leave it out entirely because if you get a job interview, they will ask you if you will relocate.If you address it at all, keep it simple. "I will re-locate if necessary."
You wrote: I am confident that an interview would be a great way to discuss this position further, instead say, I look forward to hearing from you

You wrote: I look forward to the possibility of discussing this position in more depth with you in the near future. I would take this out since it is redundant.
Hope this helps, good luck with the job. Pat P