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Dear members,

First paragapgh:
We are a team of students from Singapore national university have chosen your company, Singapore Automobiles to participate in the Online Marketing Challenge. With your cooperation, our team Empressrio will develop a free online marketing campaign by using AdWords to drive traffic to your website. Our team consist of 5 students from first year to final year students. Below is the details for our team members.
Second para:

We decided to advertise your company offical website which is the Singapore automobiles. We really hope that your company would consider our request in order to help you improve your online presence and getting more recognition of your hotel locally and internationally.
Besides, we also seek your support and advise that will help us to win the competition.

We anticipate a positive feedback from the Corporate Department in order for us to proceed with the challenge. Do not hasitate to contact me Javavid sing

Yours Sincerely,
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Hi,

We really hope that your company would consider our request

My first quick impression is that it's not clear to me what your request is. Are you simply asking for their permission to do this? Will you submit your plans to them for their approval? You need to make your meaning clearer and to put this right at the front of your letter. When they start reading the letter, the first thing in their minds wil lbe to wonder what you want from them.

All the necessary details can come later in the letter. Do they really need a lot of details about your team members?

Perhaps you'd like to reword this a bit and then repost it?

Anyway, it all sounds like fun.Emotion: smile

Best wishes, Clive
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Dear clive,

Yeah we are actually looking for a company to work with promote their new business through online marketing campaign. We want to know whether they are interested to work with us.
Hi,

Then in your letter you need to ask them whether they are interested in working with you. You need to explain why they should say 'Yes'. You also need to make clear what you want them to do, and how much of their time you will require.

As I suggested, why don't you revise your letter and post it here again for our further comments.

Best wishes, Clive
Dear clive,
Thanks for the suggestion; I followed it and modified in a way that answered your questions above. I showed the modified letter to a prof and He corrected some mistakes.

Thanks once again!

peace, love and health
Trouper
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