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Read the email below

From: D. Richards
To: Sales staff
Subject: Elena Sanchez’s retirement
Sent: April 30, 3:15 P.M

Colleagues,

Elena Sanchez, our longtime financial analyst, is retiring next week. We would like to celebrate her retirement. I’d like your ideas for what we should do, and I want to know whether you would be willing to work on the arrangements.

Thanks,

Dan Richards


Directions: Respond to the email. In your email, make TWO suggestions and offer to help with ONE task.


My answer:

Dear Dan Richards,

Retirement is our financial analyst's big change. So, I have a couple of suggestion for making a memorable party for her

Firstly, I think we should invite her family to this party. This is a special time for Elena, having her husband and children will make this stand out for them.

Secondly, why don't we prepare a meaningful gift to wish her a very happy retirement, such as a weekend trip in a local resort or a year- subscription book club.

Also, I am willing to mail her family the invitation or call them directly.

Best Regard,

Phuong Nguyen, Sale Staff

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Dear Dan Richards,

Retirement is our financial analyst's big change. (Not a good expression.) So, I have a couple of suggestion (wrong form) for making a memorable party for her (missing punctuation)

Firstly, First, I think we should invite her family to this party. This is a special time for Elena, (comma splice error, ungrammatical sentence) having her husband and children will make this stand out for them.

Secondly, Second, why don't we prepare a meaningful gift to wish her a very happy retirement, such as a weekend trip in a local resort or a year- subscription book club. (unnatural)

Also, I am willing to mail her family the invitations to her family members or call them directly.

Best Regards,

Phuong Nguyen, Sales Staff

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