The graphs below show how people in a European city reached their office and got back home in 1959 and 2009.

The pie chart illustrates the percentage of numerous methods that people prefer to travel to work and come back home in European countries from different periods 1959 and 2009.

Overall, it was significant that the majority proportion of people’s travelling methods was on foot in 1959 and by car in 1959. Moreover, it was also crucial that the average distance and average duration were increased through the time.

According to the proportion of European people’s transportation, it was clearly be seen that residents in Europe had various way of travel. First of all, it is clearly be seen that individuals who went to work on foot and came back to hoe by the same methods made up the highest percentage from all sections, which was approximately 55%, more than half of given statistic but then it was slightly decreased to 25% in 2009. Second, it was pointed up from the pie chart that there was a rapidly increase in the percentage of car using in Europe, from 10% in 1959 to 35% in 2009, which was nearly as three times higher percentage as the previous one. Other sections which were related in the pie chart accounted for the minor proportion and created a huge gap between the top and the bottom features.

On the other sides, it was surprising that the average duration and average distance were increased after the period. The time that people had to spend on travelling was 17 minutes in average in 1959 while in 2009 was 42 minutes. Another striking feature was considerable to be mentioned was the average distance that European people was travelling. It was almost as six times higher percentage as itself in 50 years previously, which was respectively 3.5 km and 19 km.

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The graphs below show how people in a European city reached their office and got back home in 1959 and 2009.

The pie chart illustrates the percentage of numerous methods that people prefer to travel to work and come back home in European countries from different periods 1959 and 2009.

Overall, it was significant that the majority proportion of people’s travelling methods was on foot in 1959 and by car in 1959. Moreover, it was also crucial that the average distance and average duration were increased through the time.

According to the proportion of European people’s transportation, it was clearly be seen that residents in Europe had various way of travel. First of all, it is clearly be seen that individuals who went to work on foot and came back to hoe by the same methods made up the highest percentage from all sections, which was approximately 55%, more than half of given statistic but then it was slightly decreased to 25% in 2009. Second, it was pointed up from the pie chart that there was a rapidly increase in the percentage of car using in Europe, from 10% in 1959 to 35% in 2009, which was nearly as three times higher percentage as the previous one. Other sections which were related in the pie chart accounted for the minor proportion and created a huge gap between the top and the bottom features.

On the other sides, it was surprising that the average duration and average distance were increased after the period. The time that people had to spend on travelling was 17 minutes in average in 1959 while in 2009 was 42 minutes. Another striking feature was considerable to be mentioned was the average distance that European people was travelling. It was almost as six times higher percentage as itself in 50 years previously, which was respectively 3.5 km and 19 km.

An QuachThe pie chart

One pie chart?

Sorry, we cannot help you if we cannot see the pie chart you are writing about. It seems like a very elaborate chart with fifty years, travel by car and walking and distances and commuting times. I cannot visualize one pie chart with that much data.

Please attach an image of it.

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The pie chart is in this link: https://www.ielts-mentor.com/writing-sample/academic-writing-task-1/3066-how-people-in-european-city-reached-office-and-got-back-home
I am a newbie, so I don't know how to import a picture in my topic



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The pie chart (That is incorrect. There are two pie charts.) illustrates (That is not a good word choice) the percentage of numerous methods (Not a good expression) that people prefer (Not a good word choice. It does not show preferences, but actual data.) to travel to work and come back home in European countries (That is incorrect. Only people in one city are in these charts.) from different periods (wrong word. There are two different years, fifty years apart.) 1959 and 2009. (Your first paragraph is incomplete. You did not tell the reader the kinds of transportation and you did not mention the other information below the chart.)


Here is an opening paragraph that describes this infographic correctly and completely.

The two pie charts, one titled 1959 and the other 2009, give the percentage of people using various means of transportation to commute to work in one European city. There are four specific categories of transportation: walking, bus, car, and train. There is a fifth category labeled "other." In addition, below each chart is information on the average distance of the trip and average time to commute.


Overall, it was significant that the majority proportion of people’s travelling methods was (very awkward and unnatural) on foot in 1959 and (Incorrect, majority is more than 50%) by car in 1959. (incorrect) Moreover, it was also crucial that the average distance and average duration were (wrong verb form) increased through the time.

Here is a better way to write this information:

Overall, in 1959, the majority of people walked, but in 2009 the largest proportion traveled by car. Moreover, the average distance increased by more than a factor of five, and the average commute time more than doubled.

If you want to use "majority" for both pie charts, you must combine categories for 2009. In 1959, the majority (55%) walked.

In 2009, the proportion of those walking and driving was 25%+35% = 60%. That is a majority. You can also combine walking + public transportation. The total is 53%. That is also a majority.


Your essay is very verbose. That means that you write a lot of words that give no information to the reader. You also make errors in reading the topic. Your essay is too long. Write only three paragraphs.

Paragraph #1: Describe the figure. Do not write about the data.
Paragraph #2: "Overall" - Write about two or three main features.
Paragraph #3: Write about some interesting details. Focus on comparisons.


According to the proportion of European people’s transportation, it was clearly be seen (This is very very awkward and unnatural) that residents in Europe (Wrong. It is not all Europeans) had various way (wrong form) Your first sentence is completely redundant. You described this in the first paragraph) of travel. First of all, it is clearly be seen that (Do not write this kind of clause. It is not what a native speaker would write The words are unnecessary) individuals who went to work on foot and came back to hoe by the same methods made up the highest percentage from all sections, which was approximately 55%, more than half of given statistic but then it was slightly decreased to 25% in 2009. Second, it was pointed up from the pie chart that there was a rapidly (wrong word) increase in the percentage of car using in Europe, (Poor English) from 10% in 1959 to 35% in 2009, which was nearly as three times higher percentage as the previous one. Other sections which were related in the pie chart accounted for the minor proportion and created a huge gap between the top and the bottom features. (That sentence makes no sense.)

On the other sides,(incorrect usage) it was surprising that (Do not write opinions or conclusions in Task 1. Just describe the information, not your reaction to it.) the average duration and average distance were increased after the period. The time that people had to spend on commuting travelling was 17 minutes on in average in 1959 while in 2009 it was 42 minutes. Another striking feature was considerable to be mentioned was the average distance that European people was travelling. It was almost as six times higher (Distances are in km, not percentage) percentage as itself in 50 years previously, which was respectively 3.5 km and 19 km.


Sample essay (195 words)


The two pie charts, one titled 1959 and the other 2009, give the percentage of people using various means of transportation to commute to work in one European city. There are four specific categories of transportation: walking, bus, car, and train. There is a fifth category labeled "other." In addition, below each chart is information on the average distance of the trip and average time to commute.

Overall, in 1959, the majority of people walked to and from their office, but in 2009 they either walked or drove, the largest proportion being those who commuted by car. Moreover, the average distance increased by more than a factor of five, and the average commute time more than doubled.

In detail, in 1959, 30% commuted by public transportation and 55% walked to work. Only one in ten used a car. This contrasts with 2009, where the percentage of those going by car was 35%, the largest category. About the same percentage (28%) used public transportation, but only a quarter walked. The commute distance had grown from 3.5 km in 1959 to 19 km in 2009, and the commute time had also increased from 17 to 42 minutes.

I have already rewrited this essay agian. Could you help me to review it for a second time ? Thanks a lot !


The pie charts delineated how residents in a European country commute to work and come back home from 1959 to 2009. There were four particular categories in two pie charts which were foot, bus, train, car. There was also a fifth options in the pie charts called “Other”.

Overall, in 1959, the majority of people commuted to work on foot while in 2009 it changed to the uprising use of car. Moreover, the average distance and the average time for committing to work were increased significantly, which proliferated by more than a factor of five and more than doubled respectively.

In detail, in 1959, 30% of people in a European’s city used public transport as their main transportation and 55% of them walked to their workplace. In contrast, in 1959, the proportion of those who used car was increased to 35% when walking curbed more than doubled from 55% to 25%. Furthermore, the people who walked made up a quarter of percentage. The commute distance grew from 3.5 km to 19 km while the average time proliferated from 17 to 42 minutes.

An QuachI have already rewrited this essay agian.

That is not good English. "Write" is irregular. The past participle is "written."

So these sentences are good:

I have rewritten this essay.
I rewrote this essay.
I have written this essay again.

Rewrite = write again..

Do not combine "again" and "rewrite" in the same sentence.

So basically you wrote:

I have written this essay again again.

You are using very strange vocabulary words. Do not look up synonyms in a dictionary and think they are interchangeable. Generally, you will make bad mistakes using words that you do not know very well.



The two pie charts delineated (that is not a good word choice) how residents in a European country (That is incorrect. The data is for residents of one city in Europe. It is not for an entire country.)

commute to work and come back home

(commute implies both going to work and returning home.)

from 1959 to 2009.

That is incorrect. From X to Y means that you have data for every year.

For example, from 2010 to 2020 has information for 2010, 2011, 2012, 2013, ..... 2019, 2020.


There were four particular categories in two pie charts which were foot, bus, train, car. There was also a fifth options (It is not correct to use "a" with a plural noun. "A" means one. This word is incorrect.

in the pie charts called “Other”.


Overall, in 1959, the majority of people commuted to work on foot while in 2009 it changed to the uprising (Uprising is a revolution of people against their government.) use of car. Moreover, the average distance and the average time for committing to work were (Do not use the passive voice. It is incorrect.) increased significantly, which proliferated (Wrong word. Proliferate is for things you can count. For example: The gardener did not take care of the flower garden, so the weeds proliferated.) by more than a factor of five and more than doubled respectively.

In detail, in 1959, 30% of people in a European’s (Wrong form. A European is one person from Europe. This person does not own a city. ) city used public transport as their main transportation (You do not need to repeat this again. You described the information in the first paragraph.) and 55% of them walked to their workplace. In contrast, in 1959, the proportion of those who used a car was (The passive voice verb form is incorrect) increased to 35% when walking curbed (wrong word - curb means to prevent something from changing or moving. It is mostly negative. ) more than doubled from 55% to 25%. Furthermore, the people who walked made up a quarter of percentage.

(Incorrect data. 25 percent (25%) is one quarter. It is also one in four, 25 in 100, 250 in 1000, or 2500 in 10,000..

A quarter of a percentage is 0.25%, which is 25 in 10,000. That is 100 times fewer that a quarter or 25%.)

The commute distance grew from 3.5 km to 19 km while the average time proliferated from 17 to 42 minutes.

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