Topic: Today, TV channels provide more men's sport shows than women's sport shows, why? Should TV channels give equal time for women's sport and men's sport.

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These days, the media devotes more screen time to sports played by men than women. This men’s dominance in televised sports could be attributed to the quickly increasing sportsmen's viewership and in my book a balance between women and men’s sports coverage should be redressed.

The underlying reason why men’s sports are almost exclusively broadcast is because of the unprecedentedly increasing number of spectators for games played by men. Therefore, quite understandably, in terms of profit, television or sports producers would tend to prioritize and devote more live broadcasts or news coverage to sportsmen at the expense of sportswomen. As a result, they would gain more publicity and from there would come more promising contracts and sponsors as well. This situation clearly explains why so many sports women are living on meager wages and their news is relegated to a scrolling ticker bar when sports news is anchored.

However, i believe that sports broadcasts should not show favoritism to men’s sports but equal air-time should be given to women. If women’s sports news is televised more, they would eventually receive equal benefits as their male counterparts do which will improve their quality of life whether in or out of season. Additionally, women gaining more respect and recognition would also help promote equality between female and male. Another reason why women’s sports coverage should be increased is because more and more girls and women are now participating in sports than before and many more sports fans are taking a liking to female players, hence television producers should take notice of them more.

In conclusion, a massive number of spectators for sports played by men could greatly explain why TV channels appear biased against women’s sports. Personally, I take the view of equalizing sports broadcasts between men and women.

[ 1] Sports programs is now a major industry, and many channels have regular sports programs on their schedule. [ 2] However, the number of [ 3] male sports shows [ 4] broadcast ed on TV which are about sports played by males is greater than that of programs about females’ female sports. Such a tendency has its reasons, and but in my opinion, both men’s and women’s sports shows should have the same air time.

The primary There are several reasons why TV producers show more men’s sports programs than ones aimed at a female audience. [ 5] their counterparts

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[ 1]: Write a general sentence at the start of the introduction to introduce the main topic to the reader. Here, it’s “sports” or “sports programs”. Try also to write a sentence giving a little background if possible.

[ 2]: Signal the issue under discussion.

[ 3]: Note how you can compose a noun phrase to take care of a complex concept. It saves you having to write a complex/awkward sentence.

[ 4]: The verb “broadcast” does not change in the past and past participle

[ 5]: “Their counterparts” suggests other TV producers.

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I’m afraid that the arguments you present in your body paragraphs are not convincing. Try to think of better ones. Make a list and post it below. DO NOT write sentences (or worry about grammar) for now. Just fill in the following list.

There are more male sports TV shows than female ones because:

1-

2-

3-

4-

There should be equal time given to both male and female sports shows because:

1-

2-

3-

4-

You might also want to take a look at my replies in the link below to learn about essay structure.

https://www.englishforums.com/English/EssayAgreeDisagreeYoungEnjoyLife-Older/bjnlwx/post.htm

https://www.englishforums.com/English/CanAnyoneCheckEssay/bwpzmg/post.htm

Students: Are you brave enough to let our tutors analyse your pronunciation?

Dear Teechr,

I'm grateful for what you're doing <3. I've learned a lot from your feedback on Nam's essay.

I don't want to bother you Emotion: smile, but it keeps nagging at me. As you posted your comments here, I wonder whether the feedback you gave also applies to my essay ^-^

PhamHyI wonder whether the feedback you gave also applies to my essay

These days, the media devotes more screen time to sports played by men than to those played by women. [ 1] This men’s dominance in televised sports could be attributed to the quickly increasing sportsmen's viewership and in my book [ 2] a balance between women and men’s sports coverage should be redressed. [ 3]

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[ 1]: That sentence belongs in the conclusion. In other words, you should not discuss the main issue in the introduction.

[ 2]: Avoid informal expressions such as “in my book” is informal.

[ 3]: That’s badly phrased. You need to express your ideas in a simple, direct and concise manner.

Try redoing your introduction, and yes, the same points I mentioned above apply to your essay. Write a general topic sentence for your first paragraph, and make a list of the reasons for the dominance of male sports on TV, and another list about why equal time should be given to both.