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In some countries, more young adults continue to live with their parents even after they have completed education and found jobs. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

It is true that in some cultures, after graduating or having a stable careers, more and more young people choose to live under the same roof with their parents. Despite some advantages of this trend, I would agree that these are outweigh by the disadvantages.

On the one hand, there are two major benefits when sharing house with the old. Firstly, children can take better care of their parents since they easily take notice their health in order to avoid unwanted diseases found in old people. In Western nations, repaying to parents bearing is believed to be one of the children’s responsibilities. According to a survey carried out by Vietnamese scientists, 65- year- old and over living with their children have the lower rate of having mental diseases. Secondly, youngsters save up a large amount of money paid for rent, electricity and water bills. They can later use that money for future intentions or emergencies.

On the other hand, I believe that the drawbacks are more significant than the advantages. One reason for this view is that the young become dependent on their parents. Living with them for a long period of time means they get used to their envolvement in almost every aspect of life. Some find it difficult to make decions for their own and need parents’ support. Another reason is that youngsters are less likely to have aspiration for such big achievements. For example, if a young adult plan to live in their parents’ house the whole life, they will not thrive for having a private home.

In conclusion, it seems to me that the disadvanatges of this problems are concerned more than the advantages.

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It is true that (Those are just filler words without any meaning. Avoid these "empty" clauses.) In some cultures, after graduating or having a stable careers, more and more young people choose to live under the same roof with their parents. Despite some advantages of this trend, I would agree that they these are outweigh (wrong verb form) by the disadvantages.

On the one hand, there are two major benefits when sharing house with one's family. the old. Firstly, First, grown children can take better care of their parents since they easily take notice of their health in order to avoid unwanted diseases found in older people are susceptible to.. In Western nations, repaying to parents bearing (I do not understand this. It makes no sense. A bearing is a part of a wheel. ) is believed to be one of the children’s responsibilities. According to a survey carried out by Vietnamese scientists, people 65- years- old (no spaces) and over living with their children have the a lower rate of having mental diseases. Secondly, Second, youngsters (A youngster is a child younger than a teenager. They go to primary school. They do not work and earn money.) can save up a large amount of money paid for rent, electricity and water bills. They can later use that money for future intentions (wrong word) expenses or emergencies.

On the other hand, I believe that (Do not write your opinion in the body paragraphs. The body paragraphs are supposed to give arguments for the opinion you expressed in your thesis statement.) the drawbacks are more significant than the advantages. One reason for this view is that the young become dependent on their parents. Living with them for a long period of time means they get used to their envolvement in almost every aspect of life. Some find it difficult to make their own decions for their own and always need the parents’ support. Another reason is that youngsters (wrong word) are less likely to have aspirations for such big future achievements. For example, if a young adult plan (wrong verb form) to live in their parents’ house their whole life, they will not thrive for having a private home. (That makes no sense.)

In conclusion, it seems to me that the disadvanatges of this problems (wrong expression. Living with your parents is not a problem, is it?) are concerned more serious than the advantages.

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Comments  

Thanks for your useful review.

Can you suggest some examples i can use for the second point in the second paragraph, about children who live with parents can be less likely to achive big goals ( such as buying their own home)?

Students: We have free audio pronunciation exercises.

The only problem in the second paragraph is the clause "I believe". Delete those words and you are fine.


Young adults who live with mom and dad and depend on them will never become independent. They may achieve great things in their career and job, but a good marriage is unlikely. Maybe they will be secure, but a security blanket is only comfort, not happiness. True happiness comes when one is free, independent, and successful. One discovers who they truly are, what they want out of life, and what makes them happy. This leads to satisfying and deep friendships and eventually, a marriage filled with love.