Topic: Some people think that reading stories in books is better than watching TV or playing computer games for children. To what extent do you agree or disagree ?

My essay:

In contemporary society, technological advancement has led to the appearance of numerous modern means of entertainment, namely television and video games. However, some people argue that traditional recreational activities like reading books are more beneficial for children. From my perspective, I totally agree with this statement.

First and foremost, early exposure to books is of paramount importance in stimulating children’s mental development. Unlike watching cartoons channels, whose visual and aural elements are available for the children to comprehend the plots, reading verbal materials require children to visualize the characters and the contents as well as contemplate the subtle messages behind the stories. Therefore, their imagination and creativity are boosted remarkably.

Second, having an interest in books is a leading contributor to a student's improvement in literacy. Obviously, the more books children peruse, the more vocabulary they accumulate for their essay writing. Moreover, by reading books, students subconsciously understand how other writers structure their stories and then incorporate these rules into their own writings.

Last but not least, reading books hardly exert any negative impacts on readers' health. It is scientifically proven that blue light emitted from technological devices such as smartphones and computers are detrimental to the user's eye quality and more seriously, children's brain function. Accordingly, choosing reading books as a recreational activity minimizes children's likelihood of suffering from such diseases.

In conclusion, I believe that children receive numerous benefits from reading books but none from playing games. Therefore, the onus is on the parents to nurture their offspring's passion for reading books as well as avoid letting the get indulged in television programs and computer games.

In contemporary society, technological advancement has led to the appearance of numerous (That is unnecessary and not really relevant to the task. If you write straightforward ideas focused on the topic, you will do better. ) we have various modern means of entertainment, such as namely television and video games. However, some people argue that traditional recreational activities like reading books are more beneficial for children and From my perspective, (The verb "agree" gives a perspective. It gives an opinion or viewpoint. The phrase, "from my perspective", is redundant.) I totally agree with them. this statement. (The statement is: "Some people argue ..." - You are not agreeing that this argument exists. You are agreeing with their opinion.)

First and foremost, early exposure to books is of paramount importance in stimulating children’s mental development. Unlike watching cartoons channels, (incorrect phrase. ) whose visual and aural elements are available (very awkward and unnatural) which are filled with lively visual action and dramatic sound effects for the children to enjoy, comprehend the plots, reading storybooks / stories / books verbal materials (wrong phrase) require children to visualize the characters and the sequence of events contents as well as contemplate the subtle messages behind the stories. Therefore, reading engages their imagination and creativity are boosted remarkably.

Second, having an interest in books is a leading contributor to a student's improvement in literacy. Obviously, the more books that children read peruse, the more vocabulary they accumulate for their essay writing. (What age group are you writing about? Children aged 3-10 watch TV cartoons, but they do not write academic essays. Teenagers write academic essays, but they don't watch cartoons. Your essay needs to be consistent, so think about and focus on one particular age group. This task is most likely about young children rather than adolescents.) Moreover, by reading books, students subconsciously understand how other writers structure their stories and then incorporate these rules into their own writings.

Last but not least, reading books has no hardly exert any (wrong verb form. Awkward.) negative impacts on readers' health. It is scientifically proven that blue light emitted from the screens of technological devices such as smartphones and computers are detrimental to the eyesight user's eye quality and more seriously, children's brain function. Accordingly, choosing reading books as a recreational activity minimizes children's likelihood of suffering from such health conditions. diseases. ( A disease is more of an illness from viruses, bacteria, or other infectious agents.)

In conclusion, I believe that children receive numerous benefits from reading books but none from playing games. Therefore, the onus is on the parents to nurture their sons' and daughters' offspring's (wrong usage. Offspring is more for baby animals, not humans. ) passion for reading books as well as avoid letting them get indulged in addicted to television programs and computer games.

Thank you so much