Topic: In the modern world, it is no longer necessary to use animals for food, clothing or medicine. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

My essay:

It is believed that these days, thanks to various advances and breakthrough in science and technology, people have not used animal for foods, clothing and drugs yet. I completely agree with this idea.

First of all, we can use a plant - based diet instead of meat from animal. Many research showed that foods originating from plants are not only provide sufficient nutrient for people but also prevent us from potential health issue such as diabetes, obesity or high - blood pressure. Besides, many people who have never used products from animal still function normally. Take vegans as an example. According to recent WHO's survey showed that vegans live longer than normal people 0.5 time because they combine between fresh diet and doing exercise regularly. In term of clothing, we can replace animal by artificial fur or high - quality syntheses fabric. It is more colorful, cheap and diversity to choose.

Secondly, it is an indisputable fact that many wealth of medical advances thank to the help of animal research. However, in the high - tech edge, people can use more and more non - animal alternative methods to test medicine before giving to human, especially using computer models. Conducting research in sophisticated computer programs is more accurate and faster. For example, scientists diagnose cancer by computer models and then give patients their results and the way of cancer treatments very quick.

In conclusion, using animal such as products for eating, wearing or producing medicine is no longer necessities due to the fact that they can be replaced by vegetarian food, artificial clothing and computer science.

Đức TrầnFirst of all, we can use a plant - based diet

a plant and fungus-based diet. Vegetarians and vegans also eat fungus, including yeast extract.

Đức Trầnmeat from animal.

It goes without saying that meat is from animals so, delete the second and third words.

Đức Trần, You really need to study how to use plural forms of nouns properly. That is very very basic English. You also need to study articles.

Since you have so many errors in this essay, I strongly recommend that your write it again and correct as many mistakes as possible. I gave you a lot of comments in the first paragraphs, but then just highlighted the problem areas.

Do not post a different essay because you will just make the same mistakes. Learn from your mistakes; don't repeat them.

If you have questions, please ask in a comment in this thread.


It is believed that these days, thanks to various advances and breakthrough (wrong form. There is more than one breakthrough, isn't there?) in science and technology, people have not used (This is simply a false belief. This is past tense. But in restaurants yesterday, millions of people were eating hamburger, chicken, fish, and many other kinds of meat. Eating meat is very popular. ) animal for foods, clothing and drugs yet. (incorrect usage) I completely agree with this idea.

First of all, we can use (wrong word) a plant - based diet instead of meat from animal. (wrong form) Many research (wrong combination) showed that foods originating from plants are (wrong word) not only provide sufficient nutrient (wrong form) for people but also prevent us from potential health issue (wrong form) such as diabetes, obesity or high - blood pressure. Besides, many people who have never used products from animal (wrong form) still function normally. Take vegans as an example. [ According to a recent WHO's survey ] showed (ungrammatical. What is the subject of this verb? There is none. The bracketed phrase is a prepositional phrase. Prepositional phrases cannot be the subject of a verb. ) that vegans live longer than normal people 0.5 time (wrong expression This makes no sense.) because they combine between (wrong word) a fresh (wrong word) diet and doing exercise regularly. In term (wrong form) of clothing, we can replace animal (wrong form) by artificial fur or high - quality syntheses (wrong form) fabric. It is more colorful, cheap and diversity to choose. (wrong expression)

Secondly, it is an indisputable fact that many wealth of medical advances thank to the help of animal research. However, in the high - tech edge, people can use more and more non - animal alternative methods to test medicine before giving to human, especially using computer models. Conducting research in sophisticated computer programs is more accurate and faster. For example, scientists diagnose cancer by computer models and then give patients their results and the way of cancer treatments very quick.

In conclusion, using animal such as products for eating, wearing or producing medicine is no longer necessities due to the fact that they can be replaced by vegetarian food, artificial clothing and computer science.

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Thank you very much. I rewrite it again. Please check it for me.

It is believed that these days, thanks to various advances and breakthroughs in science and technology, people no longer need to use products from animals, such as food, clothing items or even medicine. I completely agree with this idea.

First of all, we can eat a plant based diet instead of meat from animals. Many studies showed that foods originating from plants is not only provide sufficient nutrients for people but also prevent us from potential health issues such as diabetes, obesity or high blood pressure. Besides, many people who have never used products from animals still function normally. Take vegans as an example. According to a recent WHO's survey, many researchers showed that vegans live 0.5 times as long as normal people because they combine between fresh diet and doing exercise regularly. In term of clothing, we can replace animal by artificial fur or high quality synthesised fabric. It is more colorful, cheap .

Secondly, it is an indisputable fact that a wealth of medical advances is made with the help of animal research. However, in the high tech edge, people can use more and more non animal alternative methods to test medicine before they are given to human, especially using computer models. Conducting research in sophisticated computer programs is more accurate and faster. For example, scientists diagnose cancer by computer models and then give patients their fastest results.

In conclusion, using animal such as products for eating, wearing or producing medicine is no longer necessity due to the fact that they can be replaced by vegetarian food, artificial clothing and computer science.

You did not correct all the mistakes that I highlighted.


It is believed that these days, thanks to various advances and breakthroughs in science and technology, people no longer need to use products from animals, such as food, clothing items food AND clothing (All lists MUST have a conjunction before the last item.) or even medicine. I completely agree with this idea.

First of all, we can eat a plant-based (There are no spaces before or after a hyphen. It is ONE word) diet instead of meat from animals. Many studies showed that foods originating from plants is ("is provide" is not a valid verb form. ) does not only provide sufficient nutrients for people but also prevent prevents us from potential health issues such as diabetes, obesity or high blood pressure. Besides, many people who have never used products from animals still function normally. Take vegans as an example. According to a recent WHO's survey, many researchers showed that vegans live 0.5 times as long as normal people (e.g. If a normal person lives 80 years, a vegan lives for 40 years. (0.5 times 80 is 40). . I would rather be a normal person and not a vegan.) ) because they combine a between fresh vegetarian diet and doing exercise regularly. In term of clothing, we can replace animal skins by artificial fur or a high-quality synthetic leather. synthesised fabric. It is more colorful, cheap . (All lists MUST have a conjunction before the last item. There is no conjunction in this list.)

The highlighted errors below have not been fixed.

Secondly, it is an indisputable fact that a wealth of medical advances is made with the help of animal research. However, in the high tech edge, people can use more and more non animal alternative methods to test medicine before they are given to human, especially using computer models. Conducting research in sophisticated computer programs is more accurate and faster. For example, scientists diagnose cancer by running computer models and then give patients their fastest results. (Do they feed the fastest computer code to these patients? I don't think that would cure any cancers.)

In conclusion, using animal such as products (A product is not an animal.) for eating, wearing or producing medicine is no longer necessity (wrong form - necessary ) due to the fact that they can be replaced by vegetarian food, artificial clothing and computer modeling. science.

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