Regardless, Matt and Mike are the ones who taught me that snakes eat eggs. And when I say they eat eggs, I'm talking they eat them raw and shell-on whole.

I probably would've gone my entire life without this little bit of reptilian trivia if it hadn't been for Lynetta. Lynetta had this major-league thing for Skyler Brown, who lives about three blocks down, and every chance she got, she went down there to hang out while he practiced the drums. Well, boom-boom-whap, what did I care, right? But then Skyler and Juli's brothers formed a band, which they named Mystery Pisser.

When my mom heard about it, she completely wigged out. “What kind of parents would allow their children to be in a band named Mystery Pisser? It's vile. It's disgusting!”

That's the whole point, Mom,” Lynetta tried to explain. “It doesn't mean anything. It's just to get a rise out of old people.”

First the speaker regarded the story that snakes eat eggs is a trivia (but why say reptilian? because it's disgusting like a worm?), which is not worth mentioning.

Then he had to talk about it because it's taught by Matt and Mike, who had sth to do with Lynetta.

Lynetta and Skyler are major-league (good friends I guess). Lynetta often went to see Skyler practicing drum.

But I don't see any point for Lynetta to do so. (Well, boom-boom-whap, what did I care, right?)

The name of the bank is not a good one in the eye of Mom. But Lynetta didn't agree. She thought the name is not a big deal (That's the whole point). She was saying that Mom was too old to understand young people (It's just to get a rise out of old people.)

The above is my understanding to the paragraph. but I really have no confidence. And please correct me if I put it in a improper way. Thanks!
First the speaker regarded the story that snakes eat eggs is a trivia (but why say reptilian? because it's disgusting like a worm?), which is not worth mentioning.-- No, snakes are reptiles.

Then he had to talk about it because it's taught by Matt and Mike, who had sth to do with Lynetta.-- No, he didn't have to talk about it; he just heard that trivia because of Lynetta.

Lynetta and Skyler are major-league (good friends I guess).-- No, Lynnetta is very attracted to Skyler. A 'thing' is an attraction.

Lynetta often went to see Skyler practicing drum. But I don't see any point for Lynetta to do so. (Well, boom-boom-whap, what did I care, right?)-- No, I was not interested.

The name of the bank is not a good one in the eye of Mom. But Lynetta didn't agree. She thought the name is not a big deal (That's the whole point). -- She thought the name was indeed a big deal.

She was saying that Mom was too old to understand young people (It's just to get a rise out of old people.)-- No, the band chose the name just to irritate old people just as it has irritated Lynetta's mom.
The question is quite a long piece. Thank you for your time!

Lynetta had this major-league thing for Skyler Brown: you said thing is an attraction. Major-league is big alliance according to the dictionary. This is quite hard to put them together with be attracted to. Maybe it's just the way it is.

That's the whole point, Mom,” Lynetta tried to explain. “It doesn't mean anything. It's just to get a rise out of old people.”

Who thought the name was indeed a big deal, Mom or Lynetta? If it's Lynetta, "that's the whole point" can't be interpreted as "that's not a big deal", can it?
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'had a major-league thing for' = was very attracted to.

When my mom heard about it, she completely wigged out. “What kind of parents would allow their children to be in a band named Mystery Pisser? It's vile. It's disgusting!” “That's the whole point, Mom,” Lynetta tried to explain. “It doesn't mean anything. It's just to get a rise out of old people.”

Mom thinks it's a big deal (= it is very serious) that the band chose an obscene name. Lynetta explains that it was intended just to be obscene ('that's the point'). It doesn't have a meaning; it is just an obscene phrase designed to disgust old people.