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Hi again,
Sorry to bother you again.Here are two sentense need for your review.

Nowadays most of the international humanitarian action is dealing with the humanitarian medical aid work
(here i mean that here is humanitarian work there is medical team either peaceful or war condition)

Beside my childhood dream, I chose health profession as it has good scope of service of humanity.
(Here I just do not want to say i am in medical profession to serve the people old fashioned sentnse so I try to improvised it)

Hope to have some help.
"here i mean that here is humanitarian work there is medical team either peaceful or war condition"

What other kind of conditions are there? All types of work occur during either peace or war. Nothing is being said with that statement.

"Beside my childhood dream, I chose health profession as it has good scope of service of humanity."

Why not say.....

I have always enjoyed helping people and being a doctor allows me to both help and heal people.

There are a million ways to write that statement. Try to be as straightforward as possible.

MountainHiker
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Hi Mountainhiker,

Thanks for your reply.
Let me try explian my first sentense again.
This is my sentnse

Nowadays most of the international humanitarian action involves medical aid work.
Does it make sense

This is explaination
I mean here medical personals are part and parcel of humantrian work.They are part of humantarian team.

Thanks for your help.
Nowadays most of the international humanitarian action involves medical aid work.
Does it make sense


I am not sure that has ever changed. Hence, I would be reluctant to use "nowadays".

Instead,

International humanitarian action depends heavily on the skills of its medical aid team to blah blah blah blah.

I am not sure if that is hitting the mark?

MountainHiker
Hi Mountainhiker,

That is fine as it is serving the meaning.So nice of you with your help.
I have done rewriting according to best of my abilitybut I am not confident to post it.

Once again thanks
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Hi again,
This is revise version of my letter without external help as it was not availbe due to Xmas.So I think the forum can help to improve it.
Thanks for your help and support

Dear Sir or Madam,

I am applying for the master’s programme in International Humanitarian Action.

I will highlight my relevant knowledge, skills, and experience that qualifies me for admission to your programme. Upon graduation, I will return to the not-for-profit sector as a health professional with a solid background and training in the humanitarian aid work.

Being a health professional I aim to work for humanitarian assistance. With my personal traits and medical background, I know I can perform well in humanitarian medical aid work as well. I found it fascinating since my teenage. Living in a developing country, we need those who have specialized qualification to address complex issues of humanitarian work. Most of the international not profit sector lacks well trained local professional to run the projects in developing countries.

My first degree is in medical. I chose health profession because I have always enjoyed helping people and being a doctor allows me to both help and heal people. I worked as in charge of Basic Health Unit in rural area of district X. The exciting thing of my job was not only working as medical doctor but also it involved supervision, surveillance, monitoring, reporting of public health activities as well as recruiting, training and teaching of lady health workers. I gained more exposure to administration aspect of health. Later on, I decided to pursue my master in public health.

I completed my post graduation in public health from country X .When I took my MPH course at X(city), X (country); I was not sure how interesting this post graduation would be for me. However, as I proceeded with my master, increased my level of confidence in my abilities of analysis of disease pattern and data base, recognition of potential risk , planning and timely action. Furthermore I gained more exposure to research while writing my thesis and summer work in biochemistry laboratory. During my post graduation, I became increasingly interested in the relationship between health and humanitarian work, and I realised the importance of public health in the alleviation of suffering of humanity.

International humanitarian action depends heavily on the skills of its medical aid team to deal with natural disasters, provide medical care to out reach people and care of affected people of war and conflict. I think my medical and public health background is an excellent pathway into issues concerning the humanitarian medical aid work.

The experience of living in such sharp contrast to my life in X (city), X(country), has given me a broader view of the world and the ability to adapt to a different culture. The experience of education at UniversityX,countryX, one of the most developed country has given me maturity and dedication that I will bring to this programme.

Since my teenage I always find it interesting to work for the suffered people. I joined Leo club, sponsored program by Lions International. Since then I worked for different NGOs e.g. eye camps, blood bank, fundraising for the cancer patient etc. I have always enjoyed my volunteer work. These volunteer works groomed my organization and management skills. I worked as a part of team during my community work and led a team of editorial board of student college magazine. I also served as an elected class representative in the second year of medical college. I feel that this programme will compliment my experience with NGOs.

Now I would like to focus on a Master programme in International Humanitarian Action. I believe that the aim of the program is consistent with my academic background and aspirations. It will let me broaden my interests in International Humanitarian Work. I am confident that with the knowledge and helpful contacts gained through this program I will gain necessary skills and experience that will help me to deal with the complex issues and meet the challenges of humanitarian work.

Thank you very much for your time and considering my request. I look forward to your reply.

Yours sincerely,
I haven't been following your progress along as Mountainhiker has, Akb, but the structure and thrust of your presentation seems strong to me. As for content, it looks very good.

There are still a number of grammatical errors, and I am not sure how much MH thinks you should correct yourself, so that your letter accurately reflects your English ability for the reader.

Let me fix the first paragraph, and then have you do a careful re-read for further errors. On thing that you will eventually have to rise above is 'spellcheck' software, which is notoriously erratic. I much prefer a dictionary.

'I will highlight my relevant knowledge, skills, and experience that qualify me for admission to your programme. Upon graduation, I will return to the not-for-profit sector as a health professional with a solid background and training in humanitarian aid work.

Being a health professional, I intend to work for humanitarian assistance. With my personal traits and medical background, I know I can perform well in humanitarian medical aid work as well; I have found it fascinating since my teenage years. Living in a developing country, we need those who have specialized qualifications to address the complex issues of humanitarian work. Most of the international nonprofit sector lacks well-trained local professionals to run their projects in developing countries. '
Hi Mister Micawber,

Thanks for your help.This is all I have done through the help of this forum especaily to Moutainhiker.He helped a lot and now you also that a looked at it.So it help me to write some thing.Infact I have to finalise today.
Thanks
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Hi MoutainHiker,

Please check revise version.I need your help to improve it.
Hope to hear from you soon.
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