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Recently, arranging courses such as mathematics and philosophy that is considered to be difficult for some children is a contentious topic. Some people argue that students should study these subjects of their own choices instead of compulsory. From my perspective, I disagree with this statement.

Firstly, it is undeniable that mathematics and philosophy play an essential role in building a solid background to learn better most other subjects. In fact, various problems in terms of physics or chemistry could not be handled without mathematical concepts. For example, the Pythagorean theorem rooted from mathematics is utilized to calculate the model involving the triangle in physics. Besides, philosophy contributes to remarkable support in learning literature. To exemplify, in the philosophy lessons, students usually research and present their views about a host of practical questions that bring useful knowledge for their essays.

Secondly, mathematics and philosophy indeed provide a number of skills that are valuable in a variety of real situations. Regarding to maths, some exercises require children to count a myriad of objects and convert appropriate product value. Therefore, they encourage children to improve calculation and logical thinking skills. In terms of philosophy, lectures direct children to approach problems from different perspectives through debates among students and teachers. Thus, it seems to be a favorable condition in the development of critical thinking skills.

In conclusion, I believe that mathematics and philosophy should be obliged to study. It not only supplies the prerequisite foundation for other subjects but also improves crucial skills such as maths, logical thinking, critical thinking skills.

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Subject: Please review my IELTS essay

Message body:

Topic: Some people think that because some children find some subjects such as mathematics and philosophy difficult they ought to be optional instead of compulsory. To what extent do you agree?

My essay:

(Your text here...)

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Recently,~~ arranging~~ *(wrong word) requiring students to take *courses such as mathematics and philosophy that

**are**considered to be difficult for some children is a contentious topic.

*(That is not true. It is only a difference of opinion. Do not write false things in a formal essay.)*Some people argue that students should study these subjects

**only if they want to**

*.*~~Firstly~~, **First,** ~~it is undeniable that~~ *(Those words are unnecessary. They do not add any appreciable meaning.) *mathematics and philosophy play an essential role in building a solid background **for** ~~to learn better~~ most other subjects. In fact, various problems in terms of physics or chemistry could not be handled without mathematical concepts. For example, the Pythagorean theorem ~~rooted from mathematics~~ is **used** ~~utilized~~ to calculate the model involving the triangle in physics. Besides, philosophy contributes to **understanding themes in ** ~~remarkable support in~~ ~~learning~~ literature. To exemplify **this**, in ~~the~~ philosophy lessons, students usually research and present their views about a **variety** ~~host~~ of practical questions that **they can use in writing **~~bring useful knowledge for their~~ essays.

~~Secondly~~, **Second, **mathematics and philosophy indeed provide a number of skills that are valuable in a variety of real situations. Regarding ~~to~~ maths, some exercises require children to count a myriad *(wrong word. Myriad by definition is too many to count.) *of objects and convert appropriate product value. *(I do not understand this point. Do you mean to total up the items in a shopping cart?) *Therefore, they encourage children to improve calculation and logical thinking skills. In terms of philosophy, lectures direct children to approach problems from different perspectives through debates among students and teachers. Thus, it seems to be a favorable **contribution to ** ~~condition in the~~ development of critical thinking skills.

In conclusion, I believe that mathematics and philosophy should be **compulsory / required / mandatory.** ~~obliged to study.~~ It not only supplies** a** ~~the prerequisite~~ foundation for other subjects but also improves crucial skills such as ~~maths~~, **arithmetic, **logical thinking, critical thinking skills.