+0

In the ever-changing society today, the mushrooming of science and technology has ceaselessly changed the world in every walk of life. Although this distribution has benefited the human well-being, some claim that they gain nothing from this development. From my perspective, the proliferation of communication technology is described as a double-edged sword but its advantages may somehow outweigh its disadvantages.

On the one hand, despite the fact that the advent of the Internet lets the fingers do the walking, the drawback is inevitable, inescapable. Modern Internet-based communication devices allow long-distance relationships to easily stay in touch, do shopping and online learning. However, the contents including valuable personals and confidential documents are probably stolen illegally by hackers. This gaining unauthorized access to data has increasingly become the focus of concern to people. Consequently, they have to spend a large budget on some protection software to guarantee their information security.

On the other hand, obviously the development of human race normally coincide with technological advances. In the past, handwriting letter had been gained popularity for information exchange which took a long time to reach the receivers. Nowadays, thanks to various sophisticated technological equipment such as smartphones and laptop, with just one click at the button, users are able to make a free video phone call with and see loved ones from different countries worldwide. The advancement of this communication tool plays an integral role in fast pace lifestyle today especially for those who live far from their home or studying overseas. This method is also considered as a contributing factor to facilitate the growth of the economy via online business meeting.

In conclusion, everything has its both pros and cons, and telecommunication technology is not an exception. The investment in enhancing this field should be placed importance on due to its potential merits as mentioned above.

+0

Please do not put the essay instructions in the "Subject" line. Put it with your answer in the message body.

Subject: Please review my IELTS essay

Message body:


Topic: Some people have benefited from modern communications technology, but some people have not benefited from it at all. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

My essay:

(Your text here...)

+0

You need to learn more about pronouns.



In the ever-changing society today, the mushrooming of science and technology (That is not the topic. You need to keep to the point, e.g. ".. the rapid expansion of telecommunications systems ..." ) has ceaselessly changed the world in every walk of life. Although this distribution (wrong word) has benefited the human well-being, (wrong expression) some claim that they gain nothing from it this development. (You need to learn how to use pronouns instead of just repeating the idea in different words.) From my perspective, the proliferation of communication technology is described as a double-edged sword but its advantages may somehow (That is not a very clear opinion. Can you answer the question: To what extent do you agree? Extent words are: completely, not at all, partly, somewhat, conditionally...) outweigh its disadvantages.

On the one hand, despite the fact that the advent of the Internet lets the fingers do the walking, (Cliches and jingles do not belong in a formal essay.) the drawback is inevitable, inescapable. Modern Internet-based communication devices allow long-distance relationships to easily stay in touch, do shopping and online learning. (Relationships do not shop or learn or stay in touch.) However, the contents including valuable personals and confidential documents are probably stolen illegally by hackers. This gaining unauthorized access to data has increasingly become the focus of concern to people. Consequently, they have to spend a large budget (wrong word) on some protection software to guarantee their information security.

On the other hand, obviously the development of human race (wrong expression. You probably mean society. ) normally coincide (wrong form) with technological advances. In the past, handwriting (wrong form) letter had been gained (wrong form) popularity for information exchange but they which took a long time to reach the receivers. Nowadays, thanks to various sophisticated electronic devices technological equipment such as smartphones and laptop, (wrong form) with just one click at (wrong word) the button, users are able to make a free video phone call with and see loved ones from different countries worldwide. The advancement of this communication tool plays an integral role in fast pace (wrong form) lifestyle today especially for those who live far from their home or (missing word) studying overseas. This method is also considered as a contributing factor to facilitate the growth of the economy via online business meeting. (wrong form)

In conclusion, everything has its both pros and cons, and telecommunication technology is not an exception. The investment in enhancing this field should be placed importance on due to its potential merits as mentioned above. (Your opinion is not stated very clearly.)