Hi everyone! I got a C in mi last essay, and I am worried about my grade in my English class. Correct this please, I am still doing the conclusion. I need help!!

Compare and Contrast Essay
Film "Real Women Have Curves"

Ana and Doña Carmen

In “Real Women Have Curves”, written by Josefina Lopez and George La Voo, shows the relationship between Ana, a Mexican- American teenager and her old- traditional Mexican mother. Throughout the movie, Ana and Carmen emerge as contrasting personalities. One is dramatic and strong moral and the other open mind and confidence.

Like most children of immigrants growing up in United States, Ana clashes with her traditional mother when it comes to discussions about going to college. Ana is a smart student and receives a full scholarship to Columbia University, New York after graduating from Beverly Hills High School. Ana thinks that it is a good opportunity to better her and get a higher education. In contrast, Carmen is against Ana continuing her education. She feels that is time for Ana to work and help out her family. She wants teach Ana the skills that any traditional housewife—cleaning, cooking, raising children and taking care of her husband.
College is not only thing that Ana and Carmen argue about, overweight is other. Ana’s self esteem is strong, but she is being put down by her mother. Ana is insecure about her physical appearance, however, she overcome that task by accepting herself as a person. She thinks that a woman should be judged by her thoughts, ideas of her own and not by how her body looks like. On other hand, Carmen is always making Ana feels bad about her overweight with comments like “ if you lost weight, you could be beautiful” even thought she is in bad shape. She believes that a woman’s main purpose in life is attracting a husband and having children.

Carmen tries to enforce old traditions from her homeland on Ana. Ana deal with the situation of living home. On other hand, Carmen insists that her family can not be apart from each other. Ana falls into the transitions to becoming an independent and mature woman. While Ana is buying condoms for her first day, Carmen insists in her virginity. Ana thinks that a woman has ideas and is not all about virginity. Carmen thinks that it goes against her moral principals.

In “Real Woman Have Curves”, Ana struggle with her role of being a Latina in United States and her dream of doing things by her. I think women should be accepted for who they are, instead of their bodies shape. ….

Pilita,

I think your problem is that you are inconsistent. Some of your sentences are perfectly correct, but then you make elementary mistakes in other sentences that seem to show that you haven't totally understood why your best sentences are as good as they are!

For example, your sentence: "Ana’s self esteem is strong, but she is being put down by her mother". It's perfect - you use the verbs corrrectly, and even use a complex verb formation - she is being put down - in exactly the right way. However, in your next sentence you write: "Ana is insecure about her physical appearance, however, she overcome that task by accepting herself as a person". Here the verb "overcome" is wrong because the third person singular requires "overcomes" in the present tense. (Or you could also say "has overcome", which implies a slightly different meaning). I might be inclined to change the first comma to a semi-colon, as that would make it clear that "however" belongs to the second part of the sentence rather than the first.

Another sentence that needs a bit of thought is: "One is dramatic and strong moral and the other open mind and confidence". You need to think about the "parts of speech" that are needed here. "Moral" should be "morally", because you need an adverb to describe in what way she is strong ("is strong" is taken here to be a verbal construction). You could also phrase this as "and has strong morals". The second part of the sentence is a mess. Where is the verb? You could rely on "is", but you must then use the right type of word - adjectives rather than nouns. I would prefer a second "is", so that the whole sentence would read "One is dramatic and strong morally and the other is open minded and confident."

Read through it again and try to spot other places where these points apply - there are plenty to choose from! Re-read your opening sentence, then try it again with the first word - "In" - removed. Which is better?

Regards,

Edwy
Pilita, in the future, just one post. That way we have all the answers in one spot.

Mountainhiker help me please!!!
Teachers: We supply a list of EFL job vacancies
edwy,

Excellent comments and thank you very much for your help!!

MountainHiker