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Please help me to check it, thanks !

Last Friday was our school's Sports Day. All the pupils were very excited to take part in it. That day, all the pupils and teachers gathered in the field. The parents seated in tents while the pupils sat in their own tents, such as red team, white team, yellow team and blue team. All of us waited anxiously for the great moment.

After the speech, the race started. My best friend, Boon also participated in the race. He ran as fast as lightning and won the race. We cheered at the top of our voice when he won the race. All of the participants did their best to win the game.

The Sports Day ended at 4 p.m. The headmaster gave prizes to the winners and congratulated them. / The headmaster gave some prizes to Boon and other winners. He also congratulated the winners. The spectators gave a big hand and cheered happily to the winners. The winners smiled proudly when the teacher took photographs at them. All of the pupils were on cloud nine. It was a memorable and red letter day for them.
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Hello! Here are my suggestions. In the final paragraph, where you had two ways of stating the idea of the headmaster giving prizes and congratulations, I do prefer the first ways of stating that, but the other way is not incorrect.

Last Friday was our school's Sports Day. All the pupils were very excited to take part in it. That day, all the pupils and teachers gathered in the field. The parents sat/ were seated in tents while the pupils sat in their own tents, such as red team, white team, yellow team and blue team. All of us waited anxiously for the great moment.

After the speech, the race started. My best friend, Boon, also participated in the race. He ran as fast as lightning and won the race. We cheered at the top of our voice when he won the race. All of the participants did their best to win the game.

The Sports Day ended at 4 p.m. The headmaster gave prizes to the winners and congratulated them. (I prefer this statement) / The headmaster gave some prizes to Boon and other winners. He also congratulated the winners. The spectators gave a big hand and cheered happily for the winners. The winners smiled proudly when the teacher took photographs of them. All of the pupils were on cloud nine. It was a memorable, red letter day for them.

I hope you find this helpful.

-S
Do you get the meaning of the following sentence?

The parents sat/ were seated in tents while the pupils sat in their own tents, such as red team, white team, yellow team and blue team.

P/s: Why don't we say "The parents seated in tents", instead of using passive voice?
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Yes, I do understand the meaning. It might be a bit clearer in a format such as: "The parents sat in tents, and the pupils sat in separate tents by team, such as red team, white team..."

The reason we do not say "the parents seated in tents" is because the verb "to seat" is one that is called a transitive verb and must act on an object. One must "seat" someone or something, or one must be "seated."

*Note that this is a different word from the verb "to sit."

You can seat someone, or can even seat yourself, but to say "don't seat there," or "she seated in the chair," is not the correct usage. In order for active voice to work for your situation, you would need to say that the parents "seated themselves in tents..." or that the parents "sat in tents...".

I hope this helps.

-S
Another question,

They were seated... (seated is used as an adjective or verb here?)
Here it is an adjective. The verb is "were" (a form of "to be") and seated modifies the noun "they."

I hope this helps.

-S
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Vincent TeoPlease help me to check it, thanks ! Last Friday was our school's Sports Day. All the pupils were very excited to take part in it. That day, all the pupils and teachers gathered in the field. The parents seated in tents while the pupils sat in their own tents, such as red team, white team, yellow team and blue team. All of us waited anxiously for the great moment. After the speech, the race started. My best friend, Boon also participated in the race. He ran as fast as lightning and won the race. We cheered at the top of our voice when he won the race. All of the participants did their best to win the game. The Sports Day ended at 4 p.m. The headmaster gave prizes to the winners and congratulated them. / The headmaster gave some prizes to Boon and other winners. He also congratulated the winners. The spectators gave a big hand and cheered happily to the winners. The winners smiled proudly when the teacher took photographs at them. All of the pupils were on cloud nine. It was a memorable and red letter day for them.
Vincent TeoPlease help me to check it, thanks ! Last Friday was our school's Sports Day. All the pupils were very excited to take part in it. That day, all the pupils and teachers gathered in the field. The parents seated in tents while the pupils sat in their own tents, such as red team, white team, yellow team and blue team. All of us waited anxiously for the great moment. After the speech, the race started. My best friend, Boon also participated in the race. He ran as fast as lightning and won the race. We cheered at the top of our voice when he won the race. All of the participants did their best to win the game. The Sports Day ended at 4 p.m. The headmaster gave prizes to the winners and congratulated them. / The headmaster gave some prizes to Boon and other winners. He also congratulated the winners. The spectators gave a big hand and cheered happily to the winners. The winners smiled proudly when the teacher took photographs at them. All of the pupils were on cloud nine. It was a memorable and red letter day for them.
ths essay was superb.I like it
Last Friday was our school's Sports Day. All the pupils were very excited to take part in it. That day, all the pupils and teachers gathered in the field. The parents seated in tents while the pupils sat in their own tents, such as red team, white team, yellow team and blue team. All of us waited anxiously for the great moment.

After the speech, the race started. My best friend, Boon also participated in the race. He ran as fast as lightning and won the race. We cheered at the top of our voice when he won the race. All of the participants did their best to win the game.

The Sports Day ended at 4 p.m. The headmaster gave prizes to the winners and congratulated them. / The headmaster gave some prizes to Boon and other winners. He also congratulated the winners. The spectators gave a big hand and cheered happily to the winners. The winners smiled proudly when the teacher took photographs at them. All of the pupils were on cloud nine. It was a memorable and red letter day for them.Emotion: wink
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