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Please help me to correct if I'm wrong, thanks!

One day, Amon and Ramesh were playing football in the field. The sky was getting dark. It started to rain. While they were cycling home, the rain got heavier. They decided to take a rest. They were lucky because there was a hut nearby.

They took shelter there. Suddenly, they heard a cry for help. They peeped through a hole and saw an old man lying on the floor. Ramesh quickly kicked the door and rushed in to help the old man. The old man was too weak to talk. HIs brother, Aman felt sorry and quickly ran to the main road to get help. There were many cars travelling along that road. They refused to stop. Only a few minutes later, a taxi passed by. He stopped it and sent the old man to the hospital.

They both told their parents what had hapened. Their parents praised them for their quick action. A few days later, Mr Chong, the old man's son, came to their school to see their headmaster Mr Goh. The headmaster was very proud of them. He reward the two boys for their kindness and helpful.
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Vincent TeoPlease help me to correct if I'm wrong, thanks!

One day, Amon and Ramesh were playing football in the field. The sky was getting dark. It started to rain. While they were cycling home, the rain got heavier. They decided to take a rest. They were lucky because there was a hut nearby.

Is the man inside and they are outside? If so, then don't say they took shelter there - in the past. They had not gotten in there yet.
They decided they should take took shelter there. Suddenly, they heard a cry for help. They peeped through a hole and saw an old man lying on the floor ground. Ramesh quickly kicked open the door and rushed in to help the old man. The old man was too weak to talk. His brother, Aman, felt sorry [sorry is not the right word here. Sorry for him, worried?] and quickly ran to the main road to get help. There were many cars travelling along that road. They refused to stop. Only a few minutes later, a taxi passed by. He Aman stopped it and sent the old man to the hospital.

They both told their parents what had hapened. Their parents praised them for their quick action. A few days later, Mr Chong, the old man's son, came to their school to see their headmaster Mr Goh. The headmaster was very proud of them. He reward the two boys for their kindness and helpfulness.

Much better than your one-line sentences.
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 BarbaraPA's reply was promoted to an answer.