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More people put their personal information online (address, telephone number…) for everyday activities such as socializing on social networks or banking purposes. Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Nowadays, it is becoming increasingly common for people to provide their personal details online. Although this practice might facilitate a better user experience, I believe the trend is negative as people will likely be vulnerable to cyber-crimes.

On the one hand, updating personal information online facilitates a superior experience for online shoppers. By associating personal details with exclusive accounts, consumers can make more convenient online purchases. This is clearly exemplified when people shop on e-commerce platforms such as Amazon or Facebook. Because their identity information has already been synchronized with their sign-in accounts during an initial by the first registration, customers can skip the time-consuming data entry and transfer immediately to the final step of making a transaction. Thus, the buying process is expedited, fostering an overall convenient customer experience.

On the other hand, posting personal data on the Internet makes users potentially susceptible to criminal activities. The private information shared online including one’s names, addresses or social security numbers can be exploited for illicit purposes such as financial fraud. For instance, a hacker known as “Hieu PC’ in Vietnam ran one of the Internet’s most profitable and popular services for selling stolen identity records. He utilized his social engineering degree to exploit a wealth of vulnerable consumer data, stealing thousands a sheer volume of social security numbers and reselling them on an anonymous broker’s online platform. This led to a large number of retired workers in the United States losing million-dollar pensions to a sophisticated online hacking scheme.

In conclusion, in spite of some relatively minor conveniences, registering personal details online is a negative development considering the risk of online fraud. In my opinion, governments should establish additional privacy regulations for online shopping firms so as to mitigate security risks and better secure personal identity information

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This is the third or fourth time I have asked you to post essays in the essay forum. Do you pay any attention to our feedback at all? I have given you feedback on five essays, but you have not indicated that you read any of it. I feel like I am wasting my time and effort.


Please post essays, paragraphs, dialogues and other writing in the essay forum so a moderator does not have to move your post.
https://www.englishforums.com/English/EssayReportCompositionWriting/Forum9.htm

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Topic: More people put their personal information online (address, telephone number…) for everyday activities such as socializing on social networks or banking purposes. Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Nowadays, it is becoming increasingly common for people to provide their personal details online. Although this practice might facilitate a better user experience, I believe the trend is negative as people will likely be vulnerable to cyber-crimes.

On the one hand, updating personal information online facilitates a superior experience for online shoppers. By associating personal details with exclusive accounts, consumers can make more convenient online purchases. This is clearly exemplified when people shop on e-commerce platforms such as Amazon or Facebook. Because their identity information has already been synchronized with their sign-in accounts during an initial by the first registration, customers can skip the time-consuming data entry and transfer immediately to the final step of making a transaction. Thus, the buying process is expedited, fostering an overall convenient customer experience.

On the other hand, posting personal data on the Internet makes users potentially susceptible to criminal activities. The private information shared online including one’s names, addresses or social security numbers can be exploited for illicit purposes such as financial fraud. For instance, a hacker known as “Hieu PC’ in Vietnam ran one of the Internet’s most profitable and popular services for selling stolen identity records. He utilized his social engineering degree to exploit a wealth of vulnerable consumer data, stealing thousands a sheer volume of social security numbers and reselling them on an anonymous broker’s online platform. This led to a large number of retired workers in the United States losing million-dollar pensions to a sophisticated online hacking scheme.

In conclusion, in spite of some relatively minor conveniences, registering personal details online is a negative development considering the risk of online fraud. In my opinion, governments should establish additional privacy regulations for online shopping firms so as to mitigate security risks and better secure personal identity information.

Please help me correct this essay. Thank you so much

You have two accounts now, Tue Gia and xarong.

Which one do you want to use? It is against our policies for individuals to have more than one account.

After you answer, I will take a look at your writing.

I believe there is some misunderstanding here as I've received no notifications since November 2020, although I remember I did post two essays in 2021 on the forum. So I thought my essays were missed out. I will attach a photo to exemplify this issue. And I'm really sorry about my shortcoming in posting my essays in the wrong area.

Students: We have free audio pronunciation exercises.

I am xarong and I have nothing to do with Tue Gia, it happened that we posted the same essay here because actually, this is claimed to be a sample essay, written by a 'so-called' teacher and posted online. So I just wanted to ensure that there are no flaws in it. I do not know whether it violates against your policy to do that but I am honestly confused about the essay. I did fall for a fake teacher a long time ago, so I was detrimentally affected in terms of grammar and vocabulary, so I have to be watchful this time.

And also don't get me wrong, this is nothing personal. I feel like the essay has fully answered the topic and I want to pick up some ideas as well as topic vocabulary in the essay. But I have spot something unusual but I am not sure so I thought that you can help me with this. This is for personal use only.

Again, I'm sorry for any of the annoyance this brings to you and thank you for all of your patience.

xarongclaimed to be a sample essay, written by a 'so-called' teacher

Representing someone else's writing as your own is deceptive. It is called plagiarism.

Feedback on essays that you did not compose yourself does not really help you in your study of English.

If you post something that you did not write yourself, please put that information in the post.

e.g.

This essay claims to be a "band 8" essay. I am hesitant about using it, and other essays from the same source, as a model. What is your opinion, please?

xarongI believe there is some misunderstanding here as I've received no notifications

In your profile, you can control the notifications that you receive. Check the account settings and the 'notifications" tab. You can verify your email address with a test message.

Also, check the "spam" folder in your email account. Sometimes spam filters are too aggressive.

Students: Are you brave enough to let our tutors analyse your pronunciation?

Thank you for your advice. I will not make the same mistake again.

Thank you for your patience.

Have a nice day teacher ^^.

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